Bruises
by beckyboobearbum
Summary: LILYxJAMES FIC- domestic abuse refered to, but not explicit. To James, the need to help Lily out of a bad situation comes almost as easy as breathing...but taking those first few steps into something more than friendship couldn't be more difficult!
1. Chapter 1

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This fic works on the understanding that Lily and the marauders settled their differences and became sort-of friends in their sixth year. This has been written years, so may seem a little juvenile (lol we're talking 2007 here) …but I just rediscovered my favorite fandom and am posting it, slightly 'revised'.

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Scanning the Marauders Map in the dimly lit dorm room James's squinting eyes came upon something he didn't expect to see, and what stung him greatly. In a classroom, just off the fifth floor corridor, was his best friend and the girl he'd had a crush on since...well since he knew girls existed.

Dropping the map he all but ran out of the dormitory, leaving a very curious Remus behind, sat on his bed with half a chocolate frog hanging from his mouth.

'_What the hell's going on? Why would they be in a classroom alone together? If he's doing anything I'll kill him.'_

-

Meanwhile...

"Please Sirius, can't you just heal them?"

"No. Not this time. It's not right what he does to you!" Sirius shook his head and his long soot-black hair rustled around his stony face.

Lily's face, however, was openly pleading, her eyes wide and full of tears "Please! I can't go to Madame Pomfrey again."

"If I heal them now I'll be healing them for you all next year too, and this can't go on! Tell someone Lily please."

Her hair shook now, though it shone brilliant reds and coppers. "No one will understand." her voice sounded dejected.

"I don't understand!" He was getting frustrated now. Every time she came back from a holiday it was the same, even now near the end of sixth year, and he saw no way of changing that unless she sought help from someone.

"Please Sirius, he doesn't mean it."

"Humph!"

"No, he doesn't!" Her hands shook as she tried to reason with him. "He loves me, he does. It's just when he drinks he..."

"Hit's you!" finished Sirius angrily. "Lily, when he drinks he hit's you! Now that isn't the behavior of someone who loves you! Trust me!"

"But he's my dad!"

Sirius lost his temper and grabbed her elbow exposing her thin pale arm. "If he loved you he wouldn't do this to you Lily!" The bruises were clearly visible, purple and angry looking.

Finally the tears came but she stood firm. Shaking her hair once again she raised her chin up to his and said, "He does. It's not his fault it's the drink! I thought you understood? You know what its like not to have a perfect life!"

Sirius would have replied if it weren't for catching sight of something on her neck that had been hidden by her hair. "Lily, what's that?"

She could see where his eyes lay and moved away from him quickly. "Nothing."

"That was not nothing, Lily! Is there something on your neck?" he backed her into the wall and lifted her sheet of thick red hair to see finger shaped bruises around the side of her neck; one for each finger tip. "Wah...?" He moved away and could feel the anger bubbling in his chest. Striding back into the middle of the classroom he nearly lost control. "He need's killing! He needs murdering! Someone should do this to him and see how he likes it!" His fist smashed onto a desk and made Lily jump. "He grabbed you by the neck, Lily! By-the-neck!"

Her tears dropped from her eyes with no resistance. "It was my fault, I..."

"DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT!"

This shut her up and she wiped at her face quickly, trying to hold back sobs.

"I can't believe you still think you deserve this! After all this time! You're supposed to be smart!"

Suddenly the door opened and in strode James looking mutinous. "What's going on!" he declared loudly, staring at Sirius and then looking over to Lily. His stern expression faltered when he saw she'd been crying.

"Show him your neck!" said Sirius quickly, pointing an angry finger at a protesting Lily. "Show him! Show him what's going on!"

"No! Sirius!" she pleaded. Of all the people she didn't want to find out and in comes James Potter. She tried to straighten her expression as she turned to him "It's nothing, really Potter, Black's just being stupid."

"Me! ME?! Look at her neck Prongs! Look at her neck and her arms and tell me who's being stupid!" he almost shoved a very confused looking James towards her.

As Lily kept her eyes on the floor, tears rolling down her cheeks, James leaned closer and scanned her neck. Suddenly his eyes grew wide with realization of what he was seeing. "Who did this!? WHO DID THIS!? I'LL MURDER THEM!!"

"James..." she could hardly talk when she saw the fierceness in his eyes and his name came out as a whisper.

"I'M GONNA MURDER THEM!! WHOEVER TOUCHED YOU I'LL MAKE SURE THEY NEVER DO IT AGAIN!" He was livid.

"James, please..."

"It was her dad!" said Sirius, looking a little thankful to have someone else in the room who felt the same as he did.

"Your dad?!" asked James, his eye's still on her, scanning up her arms as she tugged her jumper down to her wrists.

"He doesn't mean it."

"Oh here we go! '_He doesn't mean it. He loves me._' Lily it's wrong!" Sirius sounded scathing and cold.

"But he does love me..." she all but whispered.

James ran both hands through his hair forcefully. Of all the things he had been expecting to come across, this was not it. "How long has this been going on?"

"Years." answered Sirius, even though the question wasn't directed at him.

James spun round. "Have you known about it for years?!" his tone was harsh again.

Sirius seemed to recognize it. "Look, at first it was just some bruising she wanted me to heal, said she'd fallen into a suit of armor. Then it was a black eye, told me a snowball had hit her in the face at Christmas...I only worked out she was being hurt on purpose after she came back from last Christmas break with black and blue legs. I've been trying to get her to go tell someone."

Reaching out suddenly and grabbing her by the wrist James went to tug her to the door. "Come on."

"James, no! Where are you going?" she tried to struggle away from him.

"We're going to tell someone right now!"

"NO!" she wrenched her arm from his grip and backed against the wall again.

He turned and watched her through angry eyes "Lily Evans, we're telling someone! If you don't do it, I will!"

"No you won't James Potter!" she tried to sound strong though her voice shook with emotion. "You dare tell a living soul and I swear I'll never talk to you ever again and that's a promise! I'll make your life hell if you say a word to anyone!"

"But you've got to…"

"No I haven't! And I won't!" maybe she would have looked comical if the situation wasn't so serious.

The door opened once more and the friendly face of Remus Lupin appeared with a small smile on his lips. "Hello. What's going on here?"

Sirius answered with a flat voice. "Close the door Moony."

Remus did as he was told and looked around.

"Oh great! Yeah, this is fantastic! Let's let all the chuffing marauders know! Why not?! Where's Peter? He'll feel left out!" Lily was flailing her arms around, a little thankful to be feeling something other than hurt.

"What the..." but Remus didn't finish. Lily sat quietly, tears leaking from her eyes every so often as Sirius brought Remus up to speed with what was happening. With obvious similarity to his friends, Remus too became angry once he'd seen the damage Lily had suffered at the hands of her drunken father. He too wanted to tell a teacher and get her to the hospital wing but she kicked up a stink to which he finally relented.

"You can't go back there though Lily." Remus whispered as he sat next to her, stroking her back soothingly. "Where will you go this summer?"

She eyed him with confusion. "Of course I'm going back there for summer."

"No chance!" James had been silent for a while, listening to Lily's protests and reasoning and trying to keep his anger from bursting from him. Even at seventeen he often found it hard to control his temper if it was something he felt strongly about.

"It's not you're decision." muttered Lily, her eyes defiantly on his.

_He_ pleaded now "But Lily what if he does it again? What if it's worse next time?"

"It won't be, he's promised me."

Sirius snorted but James ignored him. "Lily I can't sit by and watch you go back, knowing you're in danger."

She laughed a little wryly. "You make it sound like he's a death eater or something. Trust me, he was so ashamed when he did this," She motioned towards her neck. "And I'm sure he'll not do anything again. He's getting help."

James rubbed his tired eyes with his hands. Really this was the first night back from Easter break and he was supposed to be getting rest after running around for two weeks with Sirius till all hours of the morning. Whilst Sirius had been bringing Remus up to speed with things, he had thought up a plan though he wasn't sure how agreeable she would be to it. He knelt in front of her now and looked into her pale face. "Ok, ok...promise me something."

"What?" she asked cautiously, a little uncomfortable under his stony gaze.

"Promise me that if something like this happens during summer...no matter how small...you'll come to _my_ house."

She looked at him a little gone out. "Excuse me?"

James continued, "Promise you'll come to my house. You know where it is, you and Mary came that once, even if you only made it to the front door before storming off. Just promise you'll get out of his way and show up at mine. No matter what time of the day or night! Promise me that. Promise me that and I won't go and tell McGonagall."

She frowned at him but nodded nevertheless. "I promise."

He nodded and stood, letting out a long sigh. "You're probably better off getting Remus to heal your bruises rather than Padfoot...Moony's the best at that sort of thing."

Remus gave her a small smile as she rolled up her sleeves to reveal the extent of her injuries; his smile quickly faded but he healed her anyway.

"Thank you Remus." she said in a small voice, "I don't know what it is about healing charms, I can never do them..."

-

Thank you for taking the time to read! Could I be cheeky and ask you to take a few more moments to review? Update won't be too far away… x


	2. Chapter 2

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**Thank you to everyone who reviewed the first chapter! I'm so grateful to you all, and to all those who added this story to their alerts! **

**Here's the second chapter for you :D **

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Even after the sun had gone down James' t-shirt clung to his back, damp with sweat; this summer was turning out to be relentless. Glancing over at Sirius, red cheeked and shiny, he knew his best friend felt the same; uncomfortable. His father sat in his favorite armchair holding open the Daily Prophet, rustling the paper as he read. Mr Potter's glasses had slid down his nose and so he had to tilt his head slightly back in order to see the words through the lenses. Mrs Potter was untangling necklaces on her lap, listening to the wireless warble on, her rapidly graying hair coming out of the loose bun she'd tied that morning.

A loud huff escaped James's lips and he grinned at Sirius who was smiling amusedly. He then turned to look at his now empty glass which had been full of ice cold pumpkin juice mere minutes before, wishing he hadn't just gulped it down.

"Damn it's too hot." muttered Sirius wiping his brow.

"Mmmm." agreed Mr Potter distractedly.

James felt bored but couldn't really be bothered doing anything. It had been the same for the past two weeks since coming back from school. He had lasted three days on the pure euphoria of being freed from the restraints of Hogwarts until the heat had taken over. "I think I'm gonna get another juice. Do you want one?"

A glint flickered in Sirius' steel gray eyes. "Yes!"

James snickered as he took his friends empty glass with his own into the kitchen, padding down the wooden floored hallway with sticky bare feet. When the wood was replaced by tile he physically slumped; the cool of the stone was soothing and welcomed. It was only when he'd handed a newly filled glass to his friend back in the lounge did his mind get suddenly distracted from the temperature: there was a faint knocking on the front door.

The paper rustled loudly as Mr Potter's face appeared; he wore a curious expression. "Who..."

Mrs Potter shrugged at her husband but looked back down at her tangled jewelry. "James? Could you?"

He put his tempting cold glass on top of the dark wooden side table and turned back around out into the hall. It was a rather splendid hallway; the floor dark wood plank's, the walls half covered with walnut paneling, the rest adorned in deep blue patterned wallpaper and family photographs. The earlier photo's held just three people, but in the most recent couple the Potter's had been accompanied by a very smiling Sirius; something they had all insisted on.

James didn't see these though; he was intent on the door in front of him as another slightly softer knock came from the other side. _That's a bit feeble_, he thought curiously as he racked his brains to think who could be at his door at such an hour and knocking so quietly. Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw when he finally swung the heavy door towards him.

A figure. A very petite and pale figure. He would not have recognized the face of this figure if it had not got a head of deep red hair. "...Evans?"

Lily stood, her hands to her face, shaking visibly. There were angry bruises emerging around a red puffy eye and blood was almost spurting from a split in her lip. She looked a mess. Tears had soaked her cheeks, her skin was as pale as snow and her t-shirt was wet and red from blood. Trying to say something, anything, she moved her lips but it was easy to see it physically pained her. All she managed was an almost inaudible whisper.

"...James..."

He only managed to say "Lily?" before she was in his chest, sobbing loud and hard. It took him a second or two to grab her but when he did he felt her shake and heave. His mind was racing fast, searching his brain for a possible explanation as to why Lily was in his arms, crying and bloody. The conclusion he inevitably came up with resulted in the bottom of his stomach falling out.

Sirius had poked his head out of the lounge to see what was holding James up, and who was at the door. All he saw, however, was his best friend's back and an extra pair of feet as Lily was obstructed from view. "Prongs mate?"

James took no notice of the concerned voice behind him as he asked his own question to Lily. "Did he do this to you Lily? Did he do this?"

Sirius became confused and muttered "Lily?"

"Did he do this?" asked James once more into her soft hair. Any other time he would have taken in its feel, it's smell, but now that was impossible; the knot that had replaced his stomach almost made _talking_ impossible let alone admiring.

Another face joined Sirius' at the lounge door as Mrs Potter blinked at her son. "James sweetheart what's..." her brows were knitted together making her look sterner than she really was.

Lily managed to prize her face from James' chest less than an inch and almost wailed "I'm...I'm sorry, I...I..." but she couldn't finish. It had taken all her strength of mind to make it to the Potter's home and now all she wanted to do was cry till she could no longer stand, which wasn't too far off as her knee's seemed weak.

"Don't you dare apologize Lily, don't you dare." muttered James quietly. He had thought she might look up at him when she pulled away slightly but had been mistaken.

Sirius had made his way to the entangled teenagers and was staring at Lily peculiarly. "Evans...what's happened? Evans?...Lily?" He spotted blood and gasped.

Now Mr Potter joined the rest of his family in the hall, his expression worried and curious as he viewed the scene. "What's going on?"

James had managed to wrench Lily from his body and tried to look into her face, though she was making it difficult. His hands gripped her upper arms; either to stop her from retreating into his chest again or to stop her from falling to the floor, he didn't quite know which. "Lily, did - he - do - this - to - you?"

All she could do was nod, and even that made her head spin and ache. She almost slumped to the floor when he let go of her arms suddenly.

"I'M GOING TO MURDER THE BASTARD!" he yelled, throwing his now free hands up in the air and stomping around in a circle.

"JAMES!" gasped the boy's mother, her hand to her chest. She didn't tolerate swearing and he knew it; especially after she had washed his and Sirius' mouths out with _scourgify_ when she caught them cussing at a muggle neighbor when they were twelve.

Sirius was staring at Lily, his eye's wide with realization. He'd not seen her face before now but he knew exactly why James had exploded when she met his eye's. "The fucking wanker."

"Sirius?!" asked a breathless Mrs Potter but she didn't press the matter of his sudden potty mouth as she'd caught a glimpse of the girl who had been shielded by her son. "Oh my dear God!" she exclaimed, her hands flying to her mouth at the site of Lily. A gasp of equal astonishment came from her husband. She rushed to the side of this sobbing girl who she didn't know and flung a motherly arm around her shoulder. "Oh love, what's happened dear? Oh my, oh my..."

Meanwhile James was still storming around in the small space of the hall. "HE'S A DEAD MAN! A DEAD MAN!! I'M GONNA KILL THE BASTARD!"

It was a quite obviously shocked Mr Potter who attempted to subdue his son and get some answers. "James, JAMES! Calm down son, who are you going to kill? Who did this!?"

It was Sirius who answered, though it hardly sounded like him. His voice was low and dangerous, like he wasn't really talking but growling. He was clutching his wand in a bear-like grip so his knuckles had turned white. "Her father did this...a father did this to his daughter...he deserves more than death..."

Lily sobbed some more as she let herself be guided away from the doorway by Mrs Potter. She couldn't really tell what was going on around her, her head was ringing with pain.

"Close the door Jim." instructed the nearly elderly woman to her husband as she headed through to the kitchen, the shaking teenage girl leaning on her for support.

James had stopped stomping but was red and hotter than he'd ever felt in his life, even hotter than at midday out in the yard. He knew he'd have bruises along the palms of his hands where his nails dug in as he clenched his fists with incredible force. He wasn't facing his father or Sirius as he pounded one of these fists on the hall table, making the empty vase laying there clatter and tip over with the vibration. "DAMMIT!"

Mr Potter was looking from Sirius' stony livid face to his sons quivering back after he'd closed the door with his wand. "Now, tell me who is she and why on God's good earth has her father done that to her." he tried and almost managed to keep his voice level.

Sirius was silent as James spoke, his voice shaking uncontrollably as he struggled to get a grip of his anger, digging his fingers into the soft wood of the table he was still leaning on and looking at. "She's Lily...Lily from our year..." he did not see his fathers eyebrows raise with the mention of the girls name he'd heard so many times since James first came home from school. "...her dad drinks and he...he hurts her..." James shuddered with guilt and shame at not being able to convince her not to go back home for summer. He should have tried harder. "I tried to get her to go somewhere else this summer but she wouldn't listen..." he felt angry hot tears sting at his eyes as he recollected the sight of her stood in the doorway, shivering with fear and covered in blood. "I tried dad, I really did." He felt his father's large hand on his shoulder and held in the dry sob that was trying to escape. "I made her promise to come here if anything happened...anything at all. I just wish she'd have listened in the first place." he quickly wiped at his eyes underneath his wire-framed glasses. _What the hell am I crying for! _

As the three men entered the kitchen they saw Lily, still sobbing as she sat on a wooden chair at the table and Mrs Potter wringing out a cloth at the sink. "Here dear; to put on your lip for now."

With trembling hands Lily took the cold cloth and held it to her mouth, whispering "Thank you."

At the sight James pulled a chair in front of her and sat, his knee's either side of hers, and stared into her face. "Lily..." He knew she was keeping her gaze from his but didn't blame her. "Lily...are you alright?" It sounded lame, he knew, but what else could he say?

She gave the smallest of nods as she tried to wipe her lip.

"Here." he took the cloth from her shaking hand and did it for her. He took hold of her jaw softly, as gently as he could and wiped away the blood and tears, even the smudges which had somehow appeared on her neck. He remained silent as he did this, half expecting her to shove him away or slap him; half hoping she would as a sign of normality. He didn't see his mother and father watching him, faint smiles etched on their worried faces.

Lily had let James help her because she knew she couldn't do it on her own, her hands shook too much. She didn't want to have to think about the blood on her face. It was only when he finished did she attempt to speak, to tell him how she'd come to be in such a state, to answer his unspoken questions. "...I...I tried to fight back."

When his eyes met her wide watery green ones his heart nearly broke. He vaguely noticed his hand still along her jaw though he tried to do anything but dwell on the ice cold plunging happening in his chest. "You did?"

Nodding she continued, her throat hoarse and croaky "That's why...that's why I'm so..." she hung her head "...he didn't like it."

"Bastard." muttered Sirius before quickly exiting through the back door to stand out in the cooler air; anything to ease the tenseness in his chest from looking at Lily. His breaths were short and ragged, angry even, like it was all the air's fault. Too much of his long forgotten pain came flooding back and it threatened to overwhelm him. Visions of a young Sirius Black, tear sodden and bruised at the hands of his vicious father flashed before his eyes as he pushed the horror's back down where they'd been kept and locked away. He'd hoped he was the only one to know how much it hurt.

Back in the kitchen James had handed his mother the now blood stained cloth without a look at anyone else's faces; he hadn't even noticed Sirius' absence. All he could see, all he was bothered about, was Lily. "Don't worry...you're almost as good as new."

She tried to smile, she even let out a kind of strangled snigger, but that didn't stop the tears. "I can't believe he..." she couldn't finish, the memory of her fathers anger when she fought back made her hand start to shake more.

"It's ok, you're safe now, alright?" muttered James, ducking his head so as to be in her line of vision. He so wanted to make everything alright; to stop her crying and make her smile.

She looked up suddenly with wide fearful eyes. "I can't go back tonight."

"You're staying here, right dad?" replied James almost instantly. It wasn't a request as such but a statement, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Mr Potter smiled warmly at his son and then at the young girl. "Of course Lily's staying here."

"I'll be out of your hair tomorrow, I just need to give him some time to calm down." said Lily quickly; grateful for the hospitality.

This wasn't met with the warm smile of a second ago, but a stern and almost stricken face. "You most certainly will not young lady. You're not going back there." he looked to James for support.

"Lily, you can't go back. Not after this!"

"But..."

"No!" said Mr Potter, straightening up to show his conviction. "I will not allow you to return to that place, no matter if he's your father or not. I will even hold you here without permission if I have to. As a father myself I will not allow it."

Lily's eyes were wide and full as she physically shrunk in front of this near stranger she knew to be James' dad. His actions and voice made her believe every word.

"Jim, don't be so forceful." muttered Mrs Potter as she searched a small book for the proper charm to get rid of the bruises and cuts.

"Well I'm sorry dear but she's not going home." he said with an air of finality.

Lily felt numb. She was half aware of James' hand on her shoulder, rubbing in a small circle. It wasn't helping much but it was kind of soothing to think she could still feel something external.

Mrs Potter shooed her son away as she performed the couple of charms on Lily to fade her black eye, bruised arms and cut lip. They didn't go straight away but she assured a still slightly weeping Lily that by the morning she'd look a lot better. "Oh dear, just look at your t-shirt." she muttered kindly, trying to distract if anything. "I'm guessing you'd like a shower and to climb into a nice soft bed, sooth your aching head, hmm?"

Lily was guided out of the kitchen and up to a guest room which had an ensuite. She didn't look around at anyone's faces as she went.

A few minutes after she'd gone Sirius rejoined Mr Potter and James in the kitchen.

"You don't mind that I told her to come here, do you?" asked James suddenly as he realized that he hadn't warned his parents that this might happen. In fact he'd kind of forgotten about it himself.

"I'm very glad you did son." answered his father truthfully. He'd taken his spectacles off and was rubbing his tired eyes.

Sirius had lost a little of his menace. "So what's gonna happen?"

Mrs Potter swept into the room carrying Lily's dirty clothes. "She's going to stay here, that's what's going to happen."

James looked up in surprise. "Really?"

"Does she have anywhere else she could go for the rest of the summer?" asked Mr Potter.

James and Sirius exchanged unsure looks. "Well...I don't think she'd go to her sisters." said James quietly "Remus said they don't get on...and I think she said once that she doesn't have any other family..."

"Yeah," added Sirius who was also racking his brains "and she's not too close with the other girls in our year...I mean they're all friends but...not close friends. Her and Remus get on but...well he's ill at the moment."

"Well it's settled. She'll stay here." she replied.

James had gotten up off his seat and hugged his mother fiercely. "Thanks mum."

"Oh, Jamie dear." she hugged him right back, kissing his forehead, even though he had to duck so she could. "You're sweet darling." When she released him however she pointed to the red stain to the front of his t-shirt where Lily had clung onto him. "T-shirt off please!"

He smiled and stripped his top half. "Thanks mum." he said again, flashing her his most charming grin.

"Now," carried on Mrs Potter in an almost business like tone, "I don't want you two boys pestering her, not for the next few days. She'll be upset for a while and the last thing she needs is you two being...well...you two."

"Don't worry Mrs P. We'll behave, won't we Prongs?" said Sirius.

James was taken a little aback by his best friend's seriousness. "Sure yeah."

-

Upstairs, Lily spent half an hour below the hot running water of the shower. It soothed her aching body though her legs almost completely gave up. She shampooed all the drying blood from her hair that had been smeared there from her split lip and washed her face a little more thoroughly than it had been by James.

When she finally turned off the water she numbly stepped out of the shower, dried on the largest, fluffiest towel she'd ever seen (larger and fluffier than those in the prefect bathroom at Hogwarts) and dressed in a pair of James' pajama's that Mrs Potter had left for her. Then, as though she were a robot, she padded across the thickly carpeted floor, lay in a fetal position on top of the covers of the large bed and cried.

-

After an hour of Lily being upstairs James went to the bathroom and then hesitated outside the guest bedroom door she was in. He didn't know whether she was awake or asleep, whether she wanted company or to be alone.

When he heard a sniff he couldn't help his hand softly knocking on the wood before he slowly opened the door and peeked inside. "Lily?" He saw her laid on the bed, scrunched up and hugging her knees. She had looked up but now she'd gone back to staring blankly at the lamp on the bedside table. He shuffled over to her, his heart beat quickening; she looked so small and broken laid there wearing his pajama's which were very obviously too big for her. "Lily, are you alright?"

She couldn't help the sob that left her; she'd not been able to control her tears since she got onto the bed.

James' heart almost broke as he climbed onto the bed behind her and gathered her up in his arms, spooning her as he did. It was a testament to how upset she was that she didn't pull away, or shout. He held her back against his chest, rested his cheek on her damp hair and listened to her crying.

When her sobs died away he began rubbing her arm in what he hoped was a comforting way. His rubbing then moved from the arm to the side of her waist but he stopped when she flinched, inhaling some breath forcefully. Carefully he lifted the hem of the pajama top and saw why she had jumped. There, spreading violently was a large purple bruise, which looked especially painful. "Oh Merlin, Lily..."

For the first time she looked pleadingly at him, her eyes wide and rimmed violently with red. "Please James..." she whispered "Don't tell anyone...I...he..."

He felt sick. The bruise looked so painful, purple contrasted against the milky white of her skin. But she looked so worried. "It's alright Lily...I'll not tell them." This seemed to placate her a little. "But it looks like it hurts."

She nodded as she bit her lip, tears leaking from her eyes.

"Here," he slowly lifted the pajama top again "I'll fix it, alright?" He took his wand from the waistband of his jeans and pointed it down at the bruise, muttering the incantation he'd heard his mother use on Lily's black eye. He was confident it had worked as she physically relaxed a moment later and ran her hand over the still painful looking bruise. "The purple should leave in a while." he muttered down at her.

"Thank you James."

At this she turned back round into the position they'd held and James resumed his holding of her, anything to make her feel better. This time she actually hugged his arms into her stomach and sighed, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.

"I'm sorry for all this."

He squeezed slightly. "Don't you dare be sorry." he said softly into her ear. "Don't you dare. This isn't your fault and we're very happy to have you here...so just...get some sleep ok? Then if you want to talk about it in the morning we can..."

* * *

After nearly another hour Mrs Potter opened the door to the guest room and raised her eyebrows at the sight in front of her. Lily was asleep, looking grave and pale whereas James was spooning her, one arm wrapped possessively around her stomach, his other hand stroking her now dry hair. She was tempted to leave them as they were but Mr Potter had wanted to talk to him.

"Erm Jamie dear?"

James quickly looked up, his heart jumping to his mouth as he saw his mother watching him. He didn't know if she'd be mad, finding him on a bed with a girl, no matter how old they were or how innocent it all was.

"Why don't you carefully let go of her and come here?" she said softly, smiling at him.

He breathed a sigh of relief, slid his arm from around Lily, planted the smallest of kisses into her hair and climbed from the bed over to his mother. "She was upset." he muttered to the floor as Mrs Potter just seemed to stare at him.

Putting her hand on his arm she reached up and kissed her son's cheek. "That's alright darling, I'm not angry. Your father wants to speak with you before you go to bed...your own bed mind."

"Mum..." he moaned looking at the ceiling and feeling a blush in his cheeks.

She chuckled softly and watched him glance quickly back to the sleeping form of the peaceful looking girl on the bed and then headed down the hall to the stairs. She placed the blanket from the bottom of the bed over Lily who was sleepily rubbing her stomach where James' arm had been and quietly crept from the room.

**-**

**There you have it! Once again, thank you for reading and I would be ever so happy if you left a review! I reply to them all because I believe that if you take the time to leave a review then I can take the time to thank you for it X) **

**Becky xxx**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here we have it, chapter 3 :) I'd like to thank 'lasting illusion' for the 2 really lovely long reviews on the previous chapters :D thank you for taking the time out to tell me your thoughts, its grately appreciated xxx and that goes for everyone else who reviewed too; it really means alot :)**

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It was around ten in the morning when she heard the soft tapping on the bedroom door. She had been awake since about eight, but hadn't gotten out of bed. When she had woken, it had taken a few minutes to remember where she was and why she was there, which resulted in a fairly hefty wave of tears.

"Lily?"

And then she remembered him. She couldn't quite recall when he had left her side the previous night. All she knew is he was holding her when she nodded off and she woke up very alone.

"Lily, are you awake?"

She could have pretended just to sleep. She could have closed her eyes and ignored him till he left but felt as though he kind of deserved more. Shifting her legs underneath the blanket she propped herself up on an elbow and ran her hand through her hair. "Heya." Her voice was hoarse and quiet; probably from all the crying.

James stood a little way into the room looking rather sheepish with a tray in his hands. "I err...brought you something for breakfast."

Breakfast was the last thing Lily wanted right then but she smiled weakly and whispered "Thank you."

James made his way over, sliding the tray onto the bedside table and then running a nervous hand through his hair as he embarrassedly looked at her. "Erm, how are you feeing?"

Lily shrugged. How was she feeling? Should she tell him she felt numb? Like she'd never feel anything important ever again? Like the world had stopped spinning and was just slipping and sliding in random directions, taking her with it?

Nodding awkwardly he motioned over to the breakfast tray. "I didn't know what you'd want but you eat cereal at school so I brought you some of that and some fruit, just in case you're feeling healthy. I would have cooked you something more substantial but...well, neither me nor Sirius are any good at that type of thing. In fact I'm pretty sure my mum forbade us to attempt to cook anything in her kitchen since last Christmas after the infamous sausage fiasco."

Wondering whether it would be very impolite to just tell him to shut up she glanced at the contents of the dark mahogany tray. There was an off white bowl filled with what looked like a rather sugary breakfast cereal, a rather handsome looking silver spoon, a small banana, an apple and a glass of what looked like orange juice. She reached for the juice and took a sip, fully aware of him still watching her.

"Do you...err...?" He ran a hand through his hair once more before gently sitting on the edge of the bed next to her. "Are you alright?"

She didn't know what to make of his expression. It was somewhere between pity and concern, with a good measure of uncertainty thrown in too. "I...err..." She had to cough and take another sip of juice just to get her throat to work properly. "I don't know I suppose."

James became very interested in the bedspread, tracing the swirly vine pattern with his long tanned finger. "I left you to sleep. You kind of looked like you needed it." he mumbled.

This felt quite bizarre. For Lily this was as bizarre as it possibly could get. It could be said that she and James were friends but she would never have said that they were good friends. He was more of an acquaintance type friend. But now she was laid in a bed in his house, being brought breakfast and sitting uncomfortably after an evening of crying and heartbreak.

"Look Lily," he said as he finally made eye contact. "I just want to say that I'm sorry about what happened to you last night. I mean, I'm sorry it happened at all. And I want you to know that you're welcome here, you really are. My mum and dad said last night that you can stay all summer so you don't have to go back. There's plenty of room and mum's a real good cook, plus she'd be glad of some female company round the place. Just...please say you'll stay? Please. Don't go back there."

There were definite tears pricking uncomfortably at her eyes but she kept them well at bay. "I err..." His eyes were pleading to her. She didn't feel right just showing up on their doorstep and being allowed to spend the summer there but she didn't want to go back home either. No matter how much she loved her dad and no matter how much she knew he loved her she just knew he had crossed a line. No, she couldn't go back there. So silently she nodded and felt a small swell of affection when James' pleading face became happier.

"Great."

During the brief spell of silence that followed, James scanned Lily's face before saying "All the bruising is gone you know."

"Oh?" she asked, running a hand over her face tentatively. There were no tender patches or raised bumps anymore, it all felt completely normal.

"How's your, you know, side?" he asked pointing slightly at her stomach, casting his eyes downward.

Before she'd really realized that she was exposing her midriff to him she lifted the pajama top up and peered down. There was still a faint yellow tinge to the skin but it was an improvement on the previous evening. She poked it to see if it hurt and was quite pleased when no twinge of pain followed. "Feels good."

"Good." said James smiling before dragging his eyes away from her very soft looking skin, fighting the urge to reach out and touch it. "Good." he said again a little louder as he stood, trying to hide the fact that he was blushing from thinking about how soft her skin actually was. "Well I'll err...leave you to your breakfast then." He swiftly made his way over to the door. "Oh, mum laundered your clothes last night." He pointed to where they'd been placed, nice and clean, on a chair in the corner. "Me and Padfoot are downstairs in the kitchen if you want some company? If not that's ok too." He coughed quite forcefully before bidding her farewell and closing the bedroom door behind him.

Out in the hall he rested his very warm and rather flushed cheek against the cool wallpaper and exhaled. Why did she have to look that cute in a morning? He looked a complete mess when he woke up but she looked...well...cute. He quietly cursed himself for acting like such a ninny as he made his way back down to the kitchen.

-

Buried somewhere behind a rather large motorcycle repair book at the wooden table in the Potter's kitchen was Sirius Black. Usually books bored him. He often scolded Remus for his apparent torrid love affair with Hogwarts library. This book, however, was one of the very few that held his attention. "Hey Prongs mate, listen to this!"

"Do I have to?" asked James in a bored voice from behind his quidditch magazine. Really his best friend's interest with muggle motorbikes seemed borderline obsessive, not to mention a bit odd. Why any wizard would want to waist his time on a two wheeled vehicle when he could simply apparate or even sit on a broom and fly anywhere was beyond him. "It took mum forever to get the grease stains out of my jeans."

Sirius snorted. "It wasn't grease, Prongs, it was oil. It's not as if Snivelly wiped his nose down your leg."

James smirked at the insult to Snape. "That slimy git wouldn't get anywhere near my leg...unless I was kicking him in the face; then possibly."

"Hmm?" Sirius had disappeared again.

Chuckling James returned his gaze to the page he'd been reading. They had been sat in the yard but there seemed to be no breeze and the sun was blisteringly hot. He'd learnt his lesson at the beginning of summer when he received rather painful sunburn on his shoulders and ears, so now he knew to retreat indoors when the sun was set to burn.

It was early afternoon. Mrs Potter had returned at lunch time from St Mungo's where she volunteered a few days a week in the maternity wards. She'd spent most of her lunch hour upstairs with Lily; quietly talking about what had happened and consoling the teenager. The only thing she had said about it before returning to her job was that Lily would be alright, and that she had a very good head on her shoulders.

So when a very sheepish looking Lily tentatively shuffled into the kitchen James automatically stood. "Lily!"

Grey eyes appeared from behind the motorbike repair book, wide and surprised.

Feeling uncomfortable to say the least Lily did a mini wave and said "Heya..." This was followed by an awfully strained silence.

Suddenly Sirius stood, closing the book sharply. "Do you want a drink Lily? There's ice cold pumpkin juice."

"Er, yeah, thanks Sirius..."

"Prongs, sit down mate. You're making the room look untidy." Sirius shot James a stern look.

Slowly James lowered back into his seat, not taking his eyes off Lily who looked pale, tired and very unsure. "How're you feeling?"

She shrugged, thankfully taking the glass from Sirius and drinking nearly half which resulted in a minor brain freeze. "Warm I suppose."

"It's way too hot." commented Sirius casually, putting his feet roughly on the table top and sighing rather dramatically, wondering when his best friend would stop gawking and realize he was making her feel uncomfortable. "There's supposed to be a cooling charm on the house but I don't reckon its working. Do you Prongs?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you reckon the cooling charm's working?" asked Sirius again more forcefully.

"Oh err, no. Dad was gonna take a look at it when he gets a minute."

Another silence.

"So...is your dad at work?" asked Lily quietly as she traced a groove in the scrubbed wooden table top; anything to break the silence.

James nodded. "Yeah. He keeps saying he's gonna retire but...well, he never does. Likes to keep busy I reckon."

"And the fact that he'd go crazy with us in the house all day." added Sirius with a small chuckle. "That's why your mum goes to St Mungo's is it not?"

"She only took that post when _you_ moved in you know. She was as happy as Larry with _me_ in the house." retorted James mock accusingly.

There was a bark of laughter before Sirius said "Please. She couldn't wait to get away from you! She just didn't trust you in the house on your own! She's a clever lady your mum. You should give her more credit you know."

As the boys argued over whom Mrs Potter loved more Lily let out an almost silent sigh of relief. She'd been worried about coming down the stairs but couldn't sit on her bed brooding any longer than she had. She was not the type of girl who moped. She had searched the room for a book of any sort to take her mind off things but her search had only turned up a locked chest, what looked like an urn of some sort (she hadn't had the guts to see if it was empty or not) and an extra blanket which looked very homemade and reminded her of a similar blanket on the bottom of her bed at home which her mother had made when she was a toddler. This resulted in another good fifteen minutes crying but this was something she was used to; crying about her mother. It was always good to have a bit of a cry about it every now and again instead of keeping everything bottled up.

When James had taken to glaring sulkily at a very smug looking Sirius across the table Lily broached the subject she'd been thinking of all morning. "I need to go home."

James' head whipped around to her in a flash. "But you...I mean you said you'd... You promised you were going to stay!"

"And I am." she replied quickly, seeing something resembling panic in his eyes. "But I need to get some stuff...well all my stuff really. I can't wear these all summer." She looked down at her jeans and t-shirt and shrugged. "I don't think your mum would be pleased to have to wash them every night."

Letting out a sigh of relief James physically deflated his panic. "Oh right. Good." He stared at his hand, embarrassed about his outburst.

"You do know we're coming with you, yeah?!" said Sirius matter-of-factly.

"You don't have to."

"Shut up Evans." replied Sirius. "You're not facing him on your own."

Lily was shaking her head. "No I won't be facing him at all. He'll be at work till at least six. I was just gonna sneak in, get my stuff, leave him a note to let him know I'm alright and not to worry and then sneak back."

"You're going to leave him a note? I wouldn't bother." muttered Sirius dangerously.

James saw a flash of something sad in Lily's face and interrupted. "Are you hooked up to floo? Neither me or Sirius know what you're house looks like."

She shook her head. "No. It's a very muggle house."

"Have you ever used the Knight Bus?" he asked.

"The Knight Bus? Yeah, all the time. How'd you think a muggle born like me got around before I could apparate?" She was quite pleased by the impressed look she was getting off Sirius and the mildly surprised look from James.

"'Kay, Knight Bus it is then!" exclaimed Sirius standing and rubbing his hands together. "Then we can apparate back, yeah? Yeah!"

* * *

The bus ride was as eventful as always. Sirius almost got knocked out when his head hit the front window after a very sudden swerve out of the way of a family of hedgehogs crossing a quiet country lane. By the time they'd pulled up to their stop Sirius was cursing the day the Knight Bus was made, James was looking decidedly green about the gills and Lily was feeling quite nervous.

They were around the corner to the small mid-terraced house Lily grew up in and she didn't know how the two boys would react to seeing it. She was fully aware that being purebloods, both their family homes were grand; she'd seen James' first hand. So she felt almost ashamed by the very humble house at the end of the very short garden path she was now walking up.

"So this is your house Evans?" asked Sirius loudly.

She fished her cold metal key out of her jeans pocket and opened the door slowly, hoping to god that her father had gone to work with a hangover instead of taking the day off. "It's nothing special but...well..."

The door opened out into the front room as it did in every house in their road. The curtains were half drawn so the sunshine couldn't fully penetrate the room, casting a hazy sort of glow. Thankfully her father didn't rush in at the sound of the door opening. Something eased in Lily's stomach only to clench up a second later when she saw the vase broken on the floor.

Cursing herself for being so stupid as to think her father would have cleared up after his tirade Lily took out her wand and quickly mended the vase, which placed itself softly back onto the side table it had been thrown from the previous night.

She became very conscious of the two guys standing behind her, taking in their very unfamiliar surroundings.

Sirius coughed uncomfortably. "So…"

"Err, yeah…" Lily moved forward and headed towards the stairs. "My room's up here."

When they reached the small landing it was very apparent how bad a mood her dad had been in the night previous. The mirror which hung on the wall was smashed and covering the floor. Lily knew that he probably hit it with his fist when he couldn't get into her room. She raised her wand to the door and muttered the incantations that removed all the wards from her door before fixing the mirror.

"Why'd you have wards on your door?" asked James quietly.

"I err…like my privacy." muttered Lily, stepping into the sanctuary of her room. The tense feeling that held her chest throughout the rest of the house dissipated as she stood inside her small bedroom. The walls were painted pale pink, the carpet red and her furniture was off white. The usual pile of clothes and books took up the majority of space except for the single wood framed bed which was pushed against the wall. It smelt of lavender.

"Don't agree with keeping things tidy I see! Good, good…" Sirius commented as he looked around.

James however looked and felt very uncomfortable. He'd often wondered what Lily's room at home had looked like but it had never been like this in his head. He'd always pictured a big wrought iron bed and lilac everywhere. This was so normal and insignificant; exactly not how Lily appeared to him.

"Right, well I'll just…gather up my things." She lifted her school trunk up on to her bed and looked around before waving her wand at the wardrobe and pile of clothes. Things began folding themselves neatly and plopping with soft thuds into the trunk or into a pile next to it.

"What's the pile for?" asked James curiously.

"Well I can't fit everything into my trunk so that stuffs to go into a suitcase; when I find something to transfigure that is."

The books that were haphazardly stacked underneath the pile of clothes were now shrinking down to half their size and slotting orderly into the trunk of their own accord.

"You guys don't think you could go and find my two coats do you? They're in the cupboard under the stairs in the dining room. There's a big wooly navy blue one and a short red one."

The boys nodded and headed out of the room to search down the stairs. Lily let out a long sigh and looked about her bedroom. It was an odd feeling, thinking she wasn't going to be sleeping in her bed anymore or sitting with her back against the door thankful her irate father couldn't get through the various magical wards she'd placed on it. At this slip she shuddered and felt stinging behind her eyes but ignored it and continued packing her things whilst looking for a piece of parchment and a quill.

Meanwhile, downstairs the boys had located the dining room, and the cupboard in which Lily's coats resided. As James took them from the hooks Sirius began nosing into the small kitchen extension just off the dining room.

"Hey Prongs…it's a bit…small, isn't it?"

"Sshhh Padfoot! Keep your voice down." scolded James with a very heavy looking leather jacket in his arms.

"I was just saying…" he muttered as he looked out of the window. There was a low wall and he could see an old woman outside in the small yard next door. She seemed to be talking to something by her feet. "Hey Prongs, come and see this batty hag out here!"

James let out a long suffering sigh as he made his way to where is best friend was stood chuckling. "Padfoot, she's not a batty old hag, she's just an old lady, and Lily's next door neighbor."

"Shit!" said Sirius as the old lady saw them watching her and beckoned them out to her. "What do we do?"

"Oh for Merlin's sake! We go and see what she wants. When did you become such a scaredy-cat?"

"Look James, just because I don't want to be eaten by crazy old muggle ladies does not make me a scaredy-cat!"

James chuckled as he turned the key that was in the lock of the back door and stepped out into the small courtyard type back garden. He was relieved to see the old woman smiling at him, though she didn't have any front teeth.

"And who might you two young boys be, hmm?" she asked as she bent over slowly and picked up a mangy looking long haired cat which is what she must have been talking to.

Sirius nudged James forward as an indication that he wasn't intending on speaking to this muggle lady for fear of ending up as dinner.

"I'm James and this is Sirius. We're friends of Lily."

At the mention of Lily's name the old woman became a little jittery. "Is she alright? Is Lily ok? I heard – I heard shouting and breaking things last night and knew he was drunk again. She's ok though, isn't she? She didn't come round you see, and usually she does."

James felt a wave of affection for this old lady sweep through him. "She's alright. She came to my house."

"Oh good, oh I'm so relieved. He's such a bloody rotter that man! People like that shouldn't be allowed kids! I know he's only this way since his wife died but well. Battering his daughters like he does, though Petunia got away, bless her. Delicate is Petunia. Lily's made of stronger stuff but it's still not right. She needs to get herself out of it too; far away where he can't hurt her, the poor dear." She began shaking her head in dismay.

"Err, well Lily is getting out, well that's to say she's coming to stay at my house for the rest of summer."

The old lady looked him up and down before asking "Are you a boyfriend?"

James shook his head and tried to explain. "No, no I'm just her friend. We're her friends." He motioned at Sirius who was still stood behind him. "My dad won't let her come back here and mum thinks it'll be great if she stayed with us. We've got loads of room, and Sirius stays at ours too."

"Oh right." She stroked the cat in her arms for a few seconds before saying "Well anywhere's got to be better than here, waiting for him to get home drunk. If only that boarding school of hers let students stay for summer. She'd be alright then. She likes school."

James nodded politely, wondering just what Lily had told this woman about where she went during the year.

"Well send her round to say goodbye to me won't you? Love that girl I do. Will hate to see her go but its best I think."

"Alright, will do." answered James as he followed Sirius back inside the house.

"So Lily's sister got away and didn't take Lily with her? Just left her here to face up to him on her own?" asked Sirius gruffly.

James could see why Sirius sounded angry. It was something to get angry about. Surely a sister would try and protect her kin, keep her from harm.

When they arrived back in the small pink bedroom they found Lily sat at a now visible desk (that had been obstructed from view by the mound of clothes and books) writing something. On closer inspection it was clear to see she had been crying.

Knocking softly on the open door, James smiled weakly at her. "Hey…er, the old lady next door says you've got to go and say bye to her."

Lily nodded but didn't talk. She placed her quill on the desk and picked up the parchment, folding it down the middle. "I'll not be long." she muttered as she passed them both and walked down the stairs and out of site.

"What do you think that was about?" asked Sirius.

"Probably a letter to her dad."

"Why the hell would she want to write him a note anyway? The bastard knocks her about and she still feels the need to tell him where she is?!" Sirius had sat forcefully on the edge of the bed, next to the now full Hogwarts trunk.

"Yes but Padfoot…I'm not condoning what he does, alright so don't take this the wrong way but he's not drunk all the time, is he?"

"Why the hell does that matter?!"

"Just think about it! She loves him. He must be quite nice when he's sober. That's probably the dad she loves." He was shocking himself with his own insight.

Sirius huffed loudly. "Should be strung up if you ask me!"

"Oh I agree with you mate…"

There was a thick silence between them now in these unfamiliar surroundings before Sirius asked quietly "So is that what she said last night then? When you disappeared into her room?"

This made James feel weird. It's not as if he was planning on hiding this from Sirius but he kind of hoped Sirius wouldn't ask. "No…no. She didn't say much to be honest. She just cried…then fell asleep."

Sirius nodded. "Oh right… I overheard your mum tell your dad that you were on the bed with her?"

James looked at him, trying to fathom out the expression on his face. "I was, but it wasn't anything…you know. She needed a friend."

"Yeah, yeah I think I understand."

Silence, then "Are you alright Padfoot?" asked James warily.

"Sure, yeah." said Sirius dismissively. "It's just I thought I'd ask…you know. Not jump to conclusions."

"Yeah." said James quietly; wishing Lily would come back so they could go. He didn't like it when Sirius got like this. He didn't know if his best friend was a little jealous or if he was telling him off or warning him or what. He might have just been wondering what had happened; simple as that. Sometimes James thought he'd never fully understand the mind of his best friend.

When Lily did return she did her best to sound cheery as she gathered her last little bits. The very last thing she grabbed was her large patchwork quilt from the bottom of her wardrobe that her mother had made when she was young. She knew there was one in her room at the Potter's but it just made her nostalgic for this one.

"I think I'm done." she announced, standing in the middle of a tidier looking room. "Shall we get going?"

Thankful to finally be leaving this tiny muggle house James nodded enthusiastically. He tapped the trunk and large suitcase with his wand, sending them straight to his house. Then he turned to look at Sirius and Lily. "Come on then."

There was a faint clicking noise and they all heard the front door of the house open. Lily's eyes opened wide and immediately sprung with tears. "_Oh no! He must have taken the day off work and been in the pub. He'll be drunk._ _Quickly!_" she whispered desperately. "_Come on; let's go before he realizes we're here!_"

James was all for leaving but Sirius was staring dangerously at the top of the stairs. "Someone should teach him a lesson."

Lily looked panic stricken. "_Sirius please_! Please come on, let's just go. Don't do anything to him, _please_!"

After a few moments Sirius seemed to come out of his sudden mood and nodded. "Alright let's go."

"I've just got to put my wards back on my door…" she closed the door as softly as she could but it obviously wasn't soft enough.

"Lily?" shouted a voice from downstairs.

Lily's hands were visibly shaking as she held her wand up to the door and whispered incantations to keep it closed.

"Lily, are you home?" shouted the voice again.

James grabbed hold of Lily as she looked like she was about to faint from nerves and fright. "Come on Padfoot, I'll apparate with her. The front room in my house, right?"

Sirius nodded and disappeared with a pop.

"Lily are you in your room?!" shouted the man who was clearly near the top of the stairs now.

James could hear Lily whimper through her tears and held her close to him. "It's alright Lily, we'll get out of here." he whispered.

Just before they apparated from the room they heard a loud rough knocking at the bedroom door and Lily's fathers gruff angry voice.

---

Back in the safety of the Potter's front room Lily felt her legs give way beneath her but someone warm and strong had hold of her to stop her from falling. The moment she had heard the front door of her house open her mind had started swimming with fear but now she felt numb again. Her tears came thick and fast but they felt hollow. She'd left. She'd finally gotten out of there; away from him. She knew it should fill her with happiness but she couldn't help but feel empty. Now that she had no family left, she felt very alone.

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**There you go! What do your think? Care to review? Thanks for reading :) xxx**


	4. Chapter 4

**Again WOW, thank you for all the very kind reviews from everyone who took the time to tell me what they thought of the last chapter :) I can't tell you how much it boosts my confidence to recieve a few nice words; it makes me want to update sooner :P **

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**So yes, anyway...to the chapter! enjoy -**

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Sirius was all for apparating back to Lily's house and hexing Mr Evans' ass into oblivion and he was incredibly agitated when James persuaded him it was a seriously bad idea. As far as he was concerned, Lily was back and safe and relatively unharmed (except for the crying, fainting and locking herself in her room). At this point, Sirius stormed out the house and stomped down to the lake at the bottom of the Potters gardens to brood and rip grass from the ground savagely.

So James had found himself very alone, worried and bored for the rest of the day. His best mate was in one of _those_ moods (the kind James never really understood and Sirius refused to even acknowledge, let alone explain) and Lily was probably sobbing her heart out, alone and refusing to let him anywhere near her.

---

After a day or two Lily decided that enough was enough, and that wallowing in her own self-pity was not the way to repay the Potter's for their very generous hospitality. She promised herself she'd not mope and reasoned that by acting happy then maybe her emotions might catch on.

About a week went by and Lily started to feel more like herself. She particularly liked Mr Potter as she saw him most mornings before he went off to work. She'd always been an early riser, sometimes going for a walk in the morning sunshine. Mr Potter suggested one morning that she go into his study and look through the hundreds of old books that were all sat neatly in rows along the shelves of the dark mahogany bookshelves adorning the walls. Lily jumped at the chance and stood in utter awe in the doorway; it was more like a library really. He'd explained that most of them were handed down through the family and that he'd hardly read a tenth of the total amount of them.

"Now, James has never been allowed in there so stay quiet, yeah? …He's never been too careful of a lad, really." Mr Potter had said with a wink before disappearing into the kitchen fireplace.

So that's were Lily spent most of her time; trawling through the huge editions of ancient Charms, Transfiguration, Potions, Herbology books and books on any other magical subject you would care to think of; completely in her element.

---

It was Saturday and it was awfully hot outside. The strong sunshine intruded into the kitchen without apology and bathed everything in a bright yellow. Mrs Potter was quietly putting groceries away in her cupboards wondering whether she should just put aside hurting her husbands pride and call a professional to take care of the cooling charm (his measly attempts seemed to last all of two days before they petered out pathetically). "It is a big house to charm after all." she would say to his grumbles.

The rest of the house was still and silent (if not a little warm) so the knock on the front door sounded a lot louder than it was meant to.

Although she was wary of answering the door when no one else was around, Mrs Potter flicked her wand so the remaining groceries would stack themselves neatly and slowly trundled down the hall to open the large front door.

"Good day Harriett, I hope this isn't a bad time."

"Albus! Oh my, come in! No, never a bad time for you, come in."

Albus Dumbledore swept through the doorway, his cotton robes billowing around him. The hot weather didn't seem to be affecting him in the slightest and he was even sporting a rather fetching patch of sunburn across his crooked nose.

"Please Albus, come through to the kitchen and I'll get something cold for us to drink."

When sat at the kitchen table, sipping a tall cold glass of iced pumpkin tea, after the usual pleasantries had been uttered (how are you, hope you're well, did you hear about Johnson Prewitt? Etc) Dumbledore revealed the reason for his impromptu visit.

"And how's the full house?"

Mrs Potter started beaming at the mention of the unusually high number of people staying in her large Georgian home. "Oh I don't think I've ever felt the house so happy."

"Indeed." He mused happily in reply, sipping his drink.

"Well you know Sirius is all settled in anyway. That boy was settled here with us before he even moved out of home!" she gave a little chuckle and pushed a lock of straggly hair from her face. "Now Lily…"

"I must say I was very surprised Miss Evans chose to come here, Harriett."

"Oh, so were we! Well, me and Jim anyway. James seemed completely nonplussed, if not a bit upset by it all." At this point she leant a little closer to Dumbledore and lowered her voice a tiny amount. "You should have seen her Albus, she was a mess. My first thought was she'd been attacked by death eaters or something…but the reality was, well, dare I say _worse_? How has nobody ever picked up on this before now?"

Dumbledore was shaking his head, his half moon glasses flashed in the sunlight coming through the window. "I honestly can't tell you. Miss Evans has never given anyone a reason to think things were not alright at home. Her behaviour is impeccable, she's liked by just about everyone, I'm pretty sure Horace wishes he had a son to marry her off too, if not then he wishes he were 50 years younger… There was just no sign."

"Horace? As in Slughorn? But he's head of Slytherin isn't he?" At Dumbledore's affirmative answer she looked surprised. "I wouldn't have thought a man such as Horace Slughorn would look twice at someone of Lily's obviously humble beginnings. He's a pedigree chap, isn't he?"

Nodding his understanding at what she meant Dumbledore replied "Ah yes, Horace does tend to favour the well known, but you yourself have met Miss Evans, so you'll be aware she is very smart, extremely talented and has the habit of attracting positive attention. Plus she just so happens to be one of Horace's star students."

"Is that so?" queried Mrs Potter as she went to a cupboard to retrieve a half eaten cake. "Would you care for a slice?"

"Thank you my dear."

"Well, all that being said, I really think she's starting to come out of her shell. She was upset for a while, which is understandable. Do you know they went back to the house the day after she showed up and her father came home! Jim nearly hit the roof at James, letting her go back there. She spent nearly three days in her room afterwards."

"Has she expressed any wish to contact her sister?"

"No, Albus. When I asked her about her sister she just told me they didn't get on and that she wouldn't care where Lily is. It's all just too sad if you ask me."

Dumbledore nodded his agreement. "And you are agreeable to her remaining here?"

"Oh of course Albus!" exclaimed Mrs Potter as if the very question offended her. "She's more than welcome! In fact, I think you'd have an upscale riot on your hands if you tried to take her away! My boys are very fond of having Lily about; all three of them." The smile on her face was wistful; it pleased her to see just how much her three _boys_ enjoyed having Lily in the house.

He chuckled, nodding his head enthusiastically. Having witnessed James, Sirius and Lily grow up throughout Hogwarts he could have guessed that they'd all be happy at this arrangement.

"And just between you and me, Albus…well, and Jim but he's not here…we're kind of hoping James catches her eye, if you know what I mean." she winked and raised an eyebrow.

"Harriett, I don't think you have a problem there my dear."

"Do you think so? I mean it's more than a bit obvious that James is rather taken with _her_ but we weren't too sure if she was as amiable back…"

Dumbledore nodded his head slowly with that wise look in his eyes. "Take it from someone who's heard all the ins and outs from various professors and students during the past six years…Miss Evans and young Mr Potter are of the same mind when it comes to each other. They just might not be too aware of it yet."

Suddenly a loud voice sounded from upstairs.

"JAMES POTTER!!!"

Both Mrs Potter and Dumbledore looked questioningly at one another.

The voice then drifted in through the open back door. "JAMES POTTER, I SWEAR!"

"How'd you know it was me?! It could have been Padfoot!" came the reply, unmistakably from the aforementioned James Potter who was out in the courtyard.

"Ah…Lily's in her room." whispered Mrs Potter with amusement.

"I know it was you because Sirius isn't thick enough to pester me!!! Unlike someone I'm unlucky enough to know!" Lily shouted back.

"_Moi_?" answered James faking ignorance.

Mrs Potter chuckled. "They were like this the other day." she said knowingly to Dumbledore who looked amused. "James seems to think it funny to throw things through Lily's window while she's reading. Obviously, Lily doesn't. Ah she'll be hanging out of her window trying to send jinxes at him, I'll bet." Then she wandered over to the window where she could get a good view of her son and his best friend who were looking up at one of the first floor windows. "Oh to be young again, Albus."

"I whole heartedly agree with you." added Dumbledore as they both sat in silence in order to hear the ruckus outside.

Lily was in fact glaring out of her window, though she'd not drawn her wand yet. Her hair was down and flashed brilliant red in the sunshine. "Why can't you just leave me alone?!"

"And why would I want to do that?" James asked from the ground, like it was a disgusting thing to suggest.

"Oh, I don't know…because you're insufferable!"

"Come on Lily! I bet all the money in my vault you were reading!"

"Yes I was, what of it?!"

James rolled his eyes dramatically and tutted loudly. "But it's summer! You're not supposed to read in summer! You're supposed to go outside…and play!"

Lily couldn't help but laugh when Sirius started skipping about waving his arms around. "Yeah, come on Lily! Come out and play!"

"Not with you two!"

"What if we promise to behave?" asked James angelically.

"HA!" said Sirius loudly. "Promise all you want but keep me outa' this! I'm not behaving for anyone! Sirius Black does not behave!"

Lily chuckled under her breath and folded her arms. Really she'd never expect Sirius to want to behave, though she didn't think she'd ever ask him to. During the past ten days she'd been there she'd become used to his wayward behaviour and found that she quite liked it.

James had turned back to the window. "Come on Lily! Come outside, if only for a little while?!"

"What's wrong?" she shouted back, raising a cocky eyebrow and leaning forward on the windowsill "Do you miss me?"

James and Sirius exchanged a rather funny look between them before James replied. "Yes, we miss you terribly and can't have fun without you!"

"I thought as much." she replied, lazily checking her fingernails and buffing them on her t-shirt.

"So…?" asked Sirius curiously. "Are you coming down?"

Lily seemed to think about this for a few seconds before replying with "Nah!" and then she walked away from the window.

"Hey!" shouted James. "Get back here Lily Evans! You're coming outside if you like it or not!"

From somewhere in the depths of her room Lily called out "Oh really! You think so, do you? Do I not get a say?"

"No! And if you won't come down then I'll go up!"

"No you will not James Potter! Your dad locked up your broom, remember!"

James had forgotten about that. He was going to fly up there and grab her but after the whole 'being spotted by neighbours sneaking out at night for a midnight fly' thing, Mr Potter had felt it a fitting punishment to deprive his son of his broomstick (torture, as far as James was concerned, and completely unjustified). "Then I'll climb up!" he announced, after a few seconds of thinking.

Lily appeared at the window. "You wouldn't."

"Watch me!" he replied loftily as he grabbed a hold of the trellis covered in pink roses which ran up and around one of Lily's windows and began to climb.

"James! Stop, you'll end up getting hurt."

He was already regretting his decision as a big rose thorn stuck in his hand but he wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of him having to go into the house, up the stairs and pound on her bedroom door (which coincidentally had been covered in wards and such, as soon as Lily had gotten back from her house that day. When asked why she didn't take them off she shuffled her feet, looked down at the ground and mumbled, "Force of habit." before changing the subject abruptly).

"Come on now James, stop. Those roses are covered in thorns!"

"Go on Prongs!" shouted Sirius in support. "Haul ass and bring her down with you!"

"Don't encourage him, Sirius!" scolded Lily. "Alright, alright, I'll come down! Just back up and stop climbing will you?"

"You'll come down?" asked James a little quieter as he was halfway up the trellis by now.

For a second Lily wanted to sigh at the sight of him (red faced, sweaty but still very handsome) but she stopped herself. Instead she softened her voice, "Yes, I'll come down, alright?" She received a smile that spanned his entire face.

"Brilliant." he replied as he began to slowly creep back downwards where Sirius had gotten bored and was laying on a piece of lawn with a long blade of grass between his lips.

Lily went back into the room and picked up her dragon hide gloves from her trunk and a vial of something clear before she started to climb out of the window.

"Whoa! Lily there are thorns!" shouted James, his voice filled with concern.

"What do you think I'm wearing gloves for?" she shouted back over her shoulder.

"Be careful, yeah? Don't slip. Watch your bare knee's."

In a quiet undertone Sirius (who had his eyes closed) remarked, "Jeeze Prongs, you sound like your mother."

When Lily jumped the last foot to the ground James went to slap his hands together but winced. "Ow." they were covered in scratches and puncture wounds from the rose thorns.

She tutted loudly. "You stupid prat, look at your hands." then she grabbed his wrists and dragged him to where Sirius was, in order to sit down on the grass.

James let himself be led without any protest whatsoever. She almost had hold of his hand, "I'm not a prat." he mumbled quietly as he sat in front of her not really knowing if he could look anywhere but her face.

"That's a matter of opinion." answered Lily who had taken the small vile of clear liquid from her pocket, along with a tissue and had begun to wipe at the cuts on James' hands gently.

Back in the kitchen Mrs Potter was still watching the teenagers out of the window. She sighed loudly and turned to look at Dumbledore. "It's a shame the world is how it is. Those three could have had really great lives ahead of them."

Something seemed to flicker across Dumbledore's face and a crease appeared between his eyes.

"Albus?"

He sighed and took off his half moon spectacles to rub them with the hem of his robes.

"What's happened? Who was it?" she asked automatically. Too often these days this seemed to be the opening of many a conversation.

"George Kidderminster has gone missing." he replied gravely.

Her hand went to her mouth and she sat slowly. "He works for the department of Magical Law Enforcement doesn't he?"

Dumbledore nodded, "Yes, yes he does. He's not an auror…though he works behind the scenes…in the wrong hands he could be a valuable commodity."

"And there's no sign?"

Shaking his head Dumbledore gestured toward the window through which the teenagers could still be seen. "George has a wife and a daughter in the same year as James."

"Oh no, Albus, how are they coping?!"

He half smiled as he replaced the glasses on his bent nose. "Marge is staying positive, refusing to believe her husband will betray the ministry, she's convinced he's coming home…young Jessica though, she's taken it a little harder."

"What is this world coming to Albus?"

"I'm not sure Harriett, but we're trying to fight it. But as you surmise, the future for our youngsters doesn't look too good right now."

"Hogwarts will be safe for them though, right Albus? At least they'll be sheltered a little from it while they're under your care?" she replied eagerly seeking his reassurance.

"As long as I'm headmaster they'll be as safe as anywhere…but as for sheltered? I have to admit it's going to be slightly more difficult to ensure that. Some of the children…and parents for that matter would prefer _not_ to be sheltered."

Frowning, Mrs Potter straightened up a little. "Whatever do you mean?"

"I mean, Harriett, that some parents might wish for their children to take part…actively."

"No!" at his nodding she shook her head and continued, "I can't imagine a parent wanting their child in the middle of all this Albus!"

"I'm sorry my dear, I wish it were otherwise. The other side seem to be recruiting young…and in the family. Has Sirius not said anything about it?" he enquired politely.

"_Sirius_?!" she asked shocked. "What would Sirius have to do with any of this nasty business?!"

Dumbledore put a hand on hers and rubbed it soothingly. "The Black family have a habit of thrusting their specific values on the youngsters in their ranks…I'm glad Sirius escaped unscathed but I am afraid for young Regulus…"

A sudden scowl appeared on Mrs Potters face. "The Blacks should be ashamed of themselves. Albus it just about makes me _sick_!"

He nodded and decided it was about time to change the subject. "Enough of this now, there's too much darkness in this world, and for such a sunny day too." When she nodded her agreement he continued as though the past conversation had not happened. "You must give me the recipe for this cake, it's awfully light."

---

It was seven thirty in the morning and an extremely tired Sirius Black made a racket when he nodded off and his face ended up in his cereal. Although he was tired too, James all but fell off his chair laughing as Sirius wiped milk and bits of cornflake out of his eyes.

"Are you alright Sirius?" asked Lily, obviously struggling to bite back her own laughter.

"Hmmph, too early." answered Sirius as Mrs Potter handed him a tea towel.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Yes well, you can go back to bed afterwards, can't you?"

"Don't see why we've got to be up for the letters arriving anyway." he mumbled.

"Now, now Sirius my lad, you know Harriett likes to know how smart you are!" announced Mr Potter as he entered the room wearing his work robes. He'd already eaten breakfast but was waiting for the school letters to arrive in order to see how James, Sirius and Lily had done in their sixth year exams.

"But sixth year exams don't mean anything. Even you said that, didn't you Lily?!" said James.

After she'd taken a swig of coffee, Lily replied, "What I believe I said was…sixth year exams don't have any _immediate_ implications, they're merely an indication as to how we're getting along with NEWT's. I didn't say they didn't matter. All exams matter."

James made a face. "You sound like McGonagall."

"You look like a toad." she replied dryly.

As Sirius placed his head on the kitchen table he mumbled "Good comeback Lil's. Though, the insult was a little random."

"Look at him and try and tell me it was random."

Sirius peered at his best friend then turned back to Lily. "Fair point."

"Hey! I'm sat right here, you know!" grumbled James though neither Sirius nor Lily seemed too bothered by it.

"So! Who thinks they've failed?" asked Mr Potter loftily.

"Jim!"

"Come off it Harriett darling, I know none of them have. So, how do you think you guys have done? James?"

James shrugged. "Alright, I guess."

Looking a little despondent Mr Potter then turned to Sirius. "And how about you, son? Not worried at all?"

"Not. A. Jot." exclaimed Sirius as he leaned back on his chair and put his hands behind his head confidently.

Mr Potter nodded before turning to Lily. "And you my dear?"

Keeping her gaze from the boys Lily shrugged a little, "I was quite pleased in the most part. I'm not too sure about Transfiguration, I know I wasn't too happy when I came out of the practical."

"Shut up Evans." said James abruptly. Everyone but Sirius turned to look at him quickly. "Everyone knows you'll have aced everything so stop whingeing coz you'll have nothing to worry about and you know it."

"Amen." muttered Sirius.

Lily blinked at him and then set her jaw. "Excuse me?"

Recognizing the look on her face James automatically tried to backtrack. "Look, what I meant was, you'll have done fine…you always do. Don't worry."

"That is not what you just said." answered Lily steadily.

"I err…" James wasn't quite sure how to get out of this. She was holding his gaze with those bright green eyes and it made his heart beat quite fast. The thing that really made his heart sink was that he could see she felt hurt by what he'd just said.

Noticing the tension (and being the brilliant best friend he was) Sirius piped up. "Don't take any notice of Prongs at this time of the morning Lily, it's a shock to his system."

"Yeah." agreed James, enthusiastically. "Technically I should be in bed for another four hours at least. Don't take any notice."

Luckily, for James' sake, everyone was distracted by the three owls at the window. Mrs Potter took the letters from them on the sill (she refused to ever let owls into the kitchen under any circumstances) and handed them out to their respective owners.

Sirius lazily ripped the seal open on his, glanced at his results, nodded slightly and then rested his head back on the table.

Lily, who had felt something badge shaped in her envelope, opened hers quickly and felt her heart leap into her mouth. A 'Head Girl' badge slid out into her palm. With slightly trembling hands, she unfolded her letter and read it quietly.

James had shaken his envelope before he did anything. "Ah! I hear my Captain badge rattling around in there!" he announced to his smiling father before ripping into the envelope and tipping it up.

Two badges fell out.

"Hello?" said Mr Potter curiously.

"What the...?" muttered James as he picked the two badges up. He nodded when he turned over the red and gold Captain badge, as he'd been captain for two years already, but when he turned over the other badge he didn't understand. "Head Boy?"

"What?!" said Mr Potter as Mrs Potter came over quickly.

"Head Boy." said James again. "It's a Head Boy badge…"

"Never!" exclaimed Sirius, who had lifted his head from the table.

"Here, look! Head Boy badge." He shoved the badge to his best friend before he unfolded the letter quickly and read it. Everyone was silent until he said "Holy Merlin on a broomstick I'm Head Boy."

"Oh my!" whispered Mrs Potter as Sirius passed her the badge.

"Well done son!" exclaimed Mr Potter standing quickly.

"Bloody hell Prongs! Head Boy! Who in their right mind would make you Head Boy?!" said Sirius, slapping him on the back.

"Albus Dumbledore, that's who, obviously." said Mrs Potter as she came round the table to hug James fiercely. "Oh Jamie, I'm so proud of you. Really I am."

"Me too son, me too! Never saw _this_ coming! Well done!" Mr Potter followed his wife and hugged James strongly.

In the excitement, nobody had noticed that Lily was sat quietly on her chair, staring at her letter with a pale face. It was James who addressed her first.

"Lily, I've been made Head Boy! Can you believe…Lily? Are you alright?"

She looked up and nodded slowly. "Congratulations James."

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"You didn't fail, did you?" asked Sirius suddenly.

She slowly looked at him, then back at James before answering "No, no…I did well. Really well actually."

James moved closer. "So then, what's up? Why do you look like you got all T's?"

Lily slowly held out her badge and dropped it in James' hand.

When James realized what he'd been given he was even more confused. "Lily, you've been made Head Girl! That's brilliant! Mum, dad, Lily's Head Girl!"

"Oh that's lovely!" exclaimed Mrs Potter.

"Well done love." added Mr Potter jubilantly. "Good news all round this morning."

"Lily, why are you not happy about this? This is a good thing." said James, looking down at her a little concerned.

"_Is it_? Is it really such a good thing?" asked Lily, peering up at him.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?"

"James…I'm muggleborn."

"And what the hell has that got to do with it?" asked James, scowling.

Everyone else in the kitchen had gone quiet.

"It has _everything_ to do with it. I'm a muggleborn James. What was Dumbledore thinking?"

"What was he thinking?! Probably that you're the smartest, brainiest and best witch for the job, that's probably what he was thinking." answered James a little astonished Lily wasn't jumping for joy. He would have thought that this was something Lily would have wanted.

"But what about the Slytherin's?"

"What about them?"

"They don't listen to me. James, they hate my guts already! They're never going to do anything I say." said Lily who was looking a little hysterical by now.

"They'll have to Lily. They'll have no choice if you're Head Girl."

"Oh and you really think that'll make a difference to _them_? James, you know how much they hate me. I'll just be a bigger target."

At this point both seventeen year olds had completely forgotten anyone else was in the room. James squatted down next to Lily's chair so he could look her straight in the eyes. "Lily, you're the best person for the job. Dumbledore chose you because no one else would be able to handle it."

"What if I can't handle it?!" she asked quietly.

"You're talking like you're gonna be on your own. But you won't be Lily, because I'm going to be there with you and we'll help each other, just like the Head Boy and Girl should do. Last year was a bit of a sham really. Jenkins and Holloway were always at each others throats, but I guess that's what Dumbledore gets for putting a Slytherin and a Hufflepuff together." He realized he was rambling and checked himself. "What I'm saying is you won't be on your own. You'll have me to help you and Slytherin's will listen to Me." at this point his expression became a little dark.

"But…"

"No buts!" announced James as he stood quickly. "You and me are gonna be the best damn Head's Hogwarts has ever seen!"

Lily watched him for a moment. "You're not thinking this through…"

"And you're thinking about it too much."

"But I'm a muggleborn. Surely Dumbledore's only using me as an advertisement for his views on the war."

"You've definitely thought about it too much! Lily you've completely missed the mark with this."

"Oh? Are you telling me that by making two Gryffindor's Head's, one coming from an influential pureblood family and the other a muggleborn, Dumbledore's not making a political statement?!" she asked forcefully.

James rubbed at his eyes underneath his glasses. "Lily…you're going to do a good job. Stop worrying and over analyzing things. You're making a mountain out of a niffler hill. So what if Dumbledore's making a statement? It's the right statement to make."

"But that's not how I wanted to get this badge!"

"Lily, you got that badge because you deserve it, no other reason! I'm wondering why the hell I got my badge! Now that's a question."

Lily rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "That's a stupid question. You're James Potter. Everyone likes and respects you, even Slytherin's, though they'd hate to admit it. You're a leader, that's why you're Head Boy."

For a second James was quiet and then his face broke with a huge grin. "Wow Lily! I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said about me. I'm honoured!"

Lily started to turn pink in the cheeks. "Yes…well, it's true…" she muttered as she rubbed the back of her neck embarrassedly.

For a good few seconds they stayed in an awkward silence until Sirius proclaimed "Well, that was a little involved for this time in a morning. Back to bed I think!"

"Er, actually I'm still hungry." said James quietly as he made his way back to his chair.

"Yes…" said Mrs Potter who had felt a bit intrusive watching the exchange between her son and Lily. "If you like I'll cook some bacon and eggs, yes?"

"Brilliant! Thanks mum."

"Do you want some Sirius?" she'd asked but he was already half way out the door. She then turned back to the table. "Lily? Do you want some bacon and eggs dear?"

Lily, whose cheeks were still rather pink, nodded and answered politely. "Yes please Mrs Potter, thank you."

The kitchen was then filled with the noise of pans and the smell of breakfast and the two teenagers were doing everything in their power _not_ to catch one another's eyes. Mr Potter felt the sudden need to chuckle but he held it in and flooed off to work after congratulating James and Lily one more time and giving his wife a kiss and a wink.

After another few minutes of silence Mrs Potter placed two plates of bacon and eggs in front of them. "I'm so pleased for you both. It's such a prestigious thing, to be chosen as a Head. We'll have to have the summer dinner party in your honour; both of you."

"I'm sorry Mrs Potter, the summer _what_?" asked Lily.

"The summer dinner party, dear. Surely James has mentioned that we have a summer dinner party every year?" she looked pointedly at her son.

"What?!" he asked with bacon in his mouth. "It must have slipped my mind."

Mrs Potter tutted and rolled her eyes before turning back to Lily. "Every year we have a good old fashioned get together with family friends before James goes back to school. It's all good fun."

"Oh…er right…lovely." muttered Lily a little horrified.

When his mum had turned back round to the sink James whispered across the table, "You look like mums just told you your expected to strip naked and do a tap dance in front of the Wizengamot. It's not that bad, honest."

Lily managed a meek smile and a quick nod but that was all. The idea of being scrutinized by other pure blood wizards (because she was sure a family like the Potter's would be good friends with other pureblood families) was frightening; especially in the current climate. She didn't know if she'd prefer the naked Wizengamot tap dance to be honest.

---

**I can see dress robes on the horizon...**

**...and hopefully reviews also? Maybe? **

**xxx becks xxx**


	5. Chapter 5

**I am so sorry for the wait for this. Eek I've been crap I know :( **

**Anyway thankyou to all you guys who read and reviewed the previous chapters :) I love reviewers **

**And yeah I probably haven't said this in a while so's-- I dont own any of the characters or the magical world in which they live...they do however belong to JK Rowling... **

Near the end of the summer the Potter's liked to gather together their friends and have a rather formal dinner party. They didn't usually host formal events but there was always something about the end of summer which made Mrs Potter long to enjoy a frivolous evening of good food, good wine and good company. Due to the rather uncertain time they all found themselves in, this year the dinner party was scaled down some; though not in its grandeur. The dining room was decorated in the family silks that shone mahogany red and deep burnt gold and the large walnut dining table was set with porcelain and silver.

James had been looking forward to the night knowing that he was an excellent dinner guest (his mother insisted on drumming good dinner manners into him from an early age). He figured that if Lily saw him in has natural surroundings; new handsome dress robes, perfect table manners and exchanging witty anecdotes in a mature environment, she'd see just how far he'd come from the idiotic fifteen year old he once was, and fall hopelessly in love with him…sort of.

If only things would happen the way he planned.

---

At half past seven Lily stood in front of the long full-length mirror in her room and sighed. She was wearing her sage green mock-silk dress, silver dancing shoes and a simple glass bead chain. She'd swept her deep red hair into a sort-of up do, with her side fringe sweeping across her right eye, ending in a soft spiral. Ever since she learnt of this 'tradition' of the Potter's she'd been dreading it. A night spent with witches and wizards, friends of a pureblood family, was not her idea of fun.

Really she hadn't wanted to go, and neither had Sirius. They both put up a fight, taking the stance that it was a family affair and they wouldn't want to intrude but were shot down by Mrs Potter who told them to stop fretting and have some fun. At least Sirius was looking forward to the meal. Lily didn't know whether she'd be able to eat anything for fear of popping out of her dress.

Letting out another sigh Lily resigned herself to her fate. It could go either one of two ways.

"Oi Lil, you ready yet?" asked the gruff voice of Sirius through her door. "How long does it take girls to get dressed? Is there some sort of complication to slipping into a dress that us mere men don't know about?"

"Shut up you twit I had to do my hair, it wasn't playing nice." she answered.

As Sirius pushed open the door and saw her, his eyes widened then traveled down the length of the dress and then back up to her face. He let out a soft appreciative whistle. "Deary me...Prongs is gonna have a heart attack."

Lily felt a little embarrassed to have Sirius looking at her the way he was. "Is it alright? Do I look ok? Not too done up?"

The smile on his face widened warmly. "Don't worry; you look dead 'spesh."

At this she let out a soft laugh before her face settled in an anxious expression. "Sirius I'm really nervous. I've never been to anything like this before and what if I do something wrong?"

"You can't do anything wrong Lily, its only dinner then dancing. Besides it's only small this year; the Potter's, the Lupin's, the Pettigrew's, Prongs' uncle Archibald, some random Prewitt's…and then you and me, the strays. Now how do I look? Stunning, I know, but it is nice to hear someone else say it out loud!" Sirius swaggered around a little wearing pitch-black velvet dress robes.

Looking him up and down as though he were a semi-interesting second hand car for sale Lily couldn't deny that he looked good. Sirius Black always looked good. Even in the mornings when he stumbled out of his bedroom to the bathroom, his hair a mess and his eyes half closed. But now, in robes that seemed to sculpt his body, he looked incredible. "I suppose..." she muttered, her hand to her chin, "...you'll do."

Sirius stopped and gaped at her. "You suppose I'll do? _You suppose I'll do_?! Here I am, all dressed up for you, hoping to impress and you say _I'll do_. I'm hurt Miss Evans."

"You have not got dressed up to impress me!" she said cheerily, swatting him on the arm. "You're dressed up because Mrs Potter would skin you alive if you turned up to her dinner table wearing jeans and a t-shirt!"

He shrugged and smiled happily. "That too." After bowing deeply he held out his arm and spoke in a jovial voice. "May I accompany you downstairs Miss?"

Lily laughed and hooked her arm in his. "Yes you may my good sir."

As they swept from the room rather deliberately, Sirius added in an undertone, "I don't think I've ever asked a girl to accompany me _downstairs_ before..." His sly sideways glance and wink earned him another good-natured swat to the arm.

* * *

_Greeting guests. Why did it always fall to me to greet the bloody guests? _

James shuffled moodily into the drawing room where the Lupin's, Prewitt's and the Pettigrew's all sat drinking and chatting with his parents. The one person he'd been looking forward to coming was not there yet so he made his way to Remus and Peter who were rolling their eyes in unison.

"What's up?"

"Pete was just on about his mum getting ready." answered Remus indicating Mrs Pettigrew with his drink. She was a squat woman, with legs that resembled tree trunks and a very round face, though nice enough.

Peter, who mirrored his mother's stature, nodded. "She took bloody ages. Dad was on about leaving without her."

"My dad got to the fireplace and had the floo powder in his hand." added Remus. "He didn't do it though. Probably would've had him sleeping on the sofa all week if he had." He took another sip of his drink and then asked "Where's Lily?"

James shot him a knowing look and answered. "Getting ready."

"Ah! Proves my point. Women and getting ready...you'd think they were making their dresses from scratch." He paused for the appreciative chuckles from his friends before continuing. "And where's Padfoot?"

At this James snorted and gave Remus a very amused glance. "Getting ready."

All three boys lost themselves in laughter for a few minutes before they descended into idle chitchat about their summers. Remus had been over a good few times, other than that he'd been discovering the works of William Shakespeare and Peter had been on a rather long holiday to America and was sporting quite a decent tan.

James had taken to staring out of the large window, wondering which of the Prewitt twins would end up the drunkest and embarrass themselves…if not both, and didn't notice someone emerging in the doorway.

"Yowzers!" exclaimed Remus, his eyes wide.

"What?" asked James wondering what the hell 'yowzers' meant.

"Turn around Prongs." muttered Remus, shaking his drink absently in the direction of the door. "You'll see."

When James did turn around he could have sworn someone snatched his stomach from his body with clawed fingers…and his lungs...and probably his heart too. "Bloody hell." he said softly, looking Lily up and down. She looked well and truly amazing; like she was the reason that the word amazing existed. If he'd have had a glass in his hand he would have dropped it so it was a good job he'd not gotten to the drinks cupboard yet. He'd seen her 'dressed up' before, when she'd been to Slug Club parties, and he'd always liked what he'd seen. She was never _over _dressed; she had that understated thing down perfectly. Perfect.

Sirius was beaming at the room, which seemed to have halted. "Evening all." he announced with a grin, gripping onto Lily's arm as she gripped on to his.

Mrs Potter swept over to introduce Remus and Peter's parents to Lily who clung onto Sirius whilst shaking hands with everyone, smiling politely and laughing at his light hearted jokes. As they eventually made their way over to the teenagers in the corner she noticed all the adults giving her deliberate glances whilst muttering things to each other, making her feel _very_ uncomfortable.

"Wow Lily, you look great." said Remus as he put a hand on her shoulder and gave her an appreciative nod.

She looked at the floor and shuffled as she went slightly pink in the cheeks. "Thanks Remus, you look good too."

Before he could reply however Sirius cut in loudly. "Mr Lupin, could you stop flirting with my date?! Yes we all can see she's gorgeous but she doesn't need to know, she might start getting big headed about it."

"Shut up Sirius, I am not your date!"

He winked and lowered his voice. "That's not what you whispered suggestively to me on the stairs...or up in your bedroom..." He received quite a forceful swat this time, as well as a glare.

* * *

Dinner was a noisy but enjoyable affair.

James was somewhat annoyed though, when he realized Lily was placed between Remus and Sirius, whereas he took his usual place next to his father at the head of the table. ("It's the correct etiquette James, you know you sit next to your father, it's tradition." said his mother when he'd voiced his opinion on the seating arrangements.)

So for the best part of one and a half hours (and six courses) James had to make small talk with his great uncle Archie who smelt faintly of the inside of Slughorn's Potions supply cupboard and strongly of cabbage, and watch Lily laughing at an argument between Sirius and Fabian Prewitt about Merlin only knew what.

Mutinous was not the word.

And it didn't get any better when it came to after the dinner dancing.

The gramophone had been cranked up loud and the music, which had started off subdued, had become quite lively. Lily had been accosted by probably every male in the room, even Peter, after some goading from Sirius and Fabian (who'd settled their differences by then) though she had to politely ask him to stop standing on her toes a good few times. James had yet to 'make his move', though he really didn't have any other choice as Nana Prewitt had taken a shine to him, and had insisted on four dances and had also tried to get him to rub her feet; he didn't bite.

After a rather embarrassing and tiresome conversation with his slightly merry mother who drawled on about how proud she was of him, and of how she knew he would be the most amazing Head Boy, he ducked from an impending smacker on the cheek and decided that enough was enough and he couldn't put it off any longer…now was the time to show Lily what he was made of…

…_if_ he could find her.

Looking around the room of smiling happy faces James couldn't see her anywhere. How was he supposed to ask her for a dance and wow her with his flawless dancing skills if she wasn't there? Feeling more than a little deflated he made a low growling noise in his throat before slipping out of the room and into the chilly night air to regroup.

Out on the patio the smell of the all-year-round roses his mother loved so much was overwhelming. Being none-to-keen on the sickly sweetness he moved around the side of the house and stopped underneath the gazebo, covered in vines. Letting out a long, deep sigh he leant forward against the fence post and ran a hand through his hair. The night hadn't been a disaster as such; overall it had been a pleasant evening all round (apart from the old lady foot thing) though Lily had spent most of the night laughing and joking with everyone but him. Truth be told, it made James feel slightly uncomfortable watching her walking in with Sirius, smiling at Sirius, sticking close to Sirius…

"Enjoying the party?"

He whipped his head around quickly and saw green eyes staring inquisitively back at him.

"Lily!"

Her smile was warm as she moved next to him. "You alright?"

"Er…yeah. What are you doing out here?"

With a quick glance through one of the draped windows and then to the floor she looked slightly uncomfortable. "Everyone seems to be getting a little drunk."

"Ah." He could see how uneasy that made her, though he couldn't blame her one bit. If he was being honest he was beginning to feel the effects of the wine from dinner but unlike his best friend (and just about everyone else in the room) he'd refrained from drinking anymore. "Have you enjoyed yourself though?"

Meeting his eyes she smiled again and nodded. "Oh yes, I've never really met the Prewitt twins before, they're quite…spirited."

There was a weird but familiar tugging feeling inside his chest when James nodded and forced out a chuckle. "Yeah, two of a kind, them lads."

A silence drifted over them; there wasn't even a breeze to rustle the vines and shrubs around them. Lily was looking out over the large expanse of garden in front of them as James contemplated his next move.

"It's going to be so weird, going back to school." she said out into the black, almost wistfully.

James nodded, though knew she wasn't taking any notice of his response.

"Especially now I'm friends with you and Sirius; Hogwarts won't know what's hit it!" she shot him a sly sideways glance and the hint of a smile.

That tugging at his chest melted with a tingle and he laughed quietly. "What do you mean? The fact that me and Padfoot have calmed down a bit, or that we've livened you up a bit?!"

She contemplated this for a moment and settled with the answer "Both."

As she picked a few leaves from the bush next to her James wondered what was the best way to get her back indoors, but away from everyone else long enough for a slow dance. He was brought back to reality as Lily sighed deeply.

"What's up?"

Keeping her eyes on the bush and rubbing sap from one of the leaves she'd pulled in between her fingers she said "This summer has been a little bizarre."

Not knowing how to reply he asked "Bizarre good, or bizarre bad?"

She shrugged, letting that thoroughly disheveled leaf fall to the ground and picking a fresh one. "Good and bad I suppose." There was a minute of silence before she spoke again, her voice quiet, but steady. "Is it weird to miss him?"

"Who?"

"My dad."

He'd not been expecting that. "I dunno." The sadness in her face did something funny to his stomach.

"Because I do, you know; miss him, I mean…" She swept her fringe out of her eyes and expelled some air before continuing. "I just can't believe I've spent so much time out of school and away from him, you know? It's really…weird."

He didn't understand what she was getting at. "But you're glad to be away from him, right? After what happened."

When her eyes next met his they were full of everything except gladness.

"Lily, come on! He beat you and you still want to go back to him?!" he asked loudly.

"I didn't say that!" she replied, her brows furrowing,

His brows furrowed too. "You didn't need to, it's written all over your face."

"I can't help missing him James. He's my father! I can't just walk out on him and forget he ever existed, no matter what he did. I just can't do that!"

"So what now?!" he asked angrily. "Are you just going to go running back, waiting for him to do it all over again?"

"I'm not going anywhere James, you're missing the point." she replied, quieter than before.

"Yes I am! Yes I am missing the point! Completely!"

Her sigh was more of a huff this time. "I'm just trying to say that I miss him, and that it still hurts. Why can't I say that?"

"Because you shouldn't miss him! Because you should be happy to be rid of him!"

Her face turned back into a scowl "I'll never be rid of him! I don't ever _want_ to be rid of him! Why are you not even trying to understand how I feel? You think I shouldn't care about him anymore so it must be so? How can you even know how I should feel, you've never been hurt by someone you love! You've always had your parents there for you, supporting you, loving you, every minute of every day! I may not have it constantly, like you do, but that doesn't make it any less important when I have had it!"

"I'm not saying that Lily, I just don't understand how you can turn up on my doorstep how you did, or when he almost caught us sneaking back to get your stuff, how petrified you were, how can you tell me you care about someone you're so frightened of?"

For a second it looked as though she was going to yell back; let rip a whole bunch of feelings she'd kept bottled up since she'd left home, or even before that, but she didn't. Instead she took a large breath and seemed to push it all back down. "I don't expect you to understand. But I would have expected you to at least respect how I feel."

"But how you feel is wrong." said James, frustrated with the situation. He'd only wanted to get her inside for a dance and now they were arguing? He felt exasperated and confused.

She stared straight into his eyes, one of those stares that can stop the heart of any man and spoke calmly, though her voice shook slightly and those almond shaped eyes narrowed. "Yes, perhaps what I feel _**is**_ wrong, perhaps _**all**_ my feelings are wrong…about everything." And then she turned to leave.

It was then that everything went into slow motion.

What Lily had just said struck a cord somewhere inside James mind that slowed everything down and made it all seem surreal. His mind played over the words '_about everything_' over and over again. What had she meant? What _could_ she have meant? She couldn't have meant…or could she…?

His hand eventually grasped her arm and the world became normal again.

"Lily…"

"Just let go of me James! Just…let me go." She whispered the last words through watery eyes and James could do nothing but relax his hand and watch her sweep away from him, her hand furiously wiping at her eyes.

---

While the party was still going along its merry way downstairs, a fraught and anxious James was pacing along the first floor landing carpet, unconsciously nibbling at the corner of a his nail and running his other hand through his hair.

He _**had**_ to get this right. He couldn't mess _**this**_ up.

---

When Lily heard the soft knock on her bedroom door she knew instinctively who it was. Nobody knocked like that but him. It was funny how she could differentiate his knock from all the other knocks in the world, even though she may not have heard them all. Her heart had automatically taken up residence in her throat as she lay perfectly still, not even breathing.

When the soft knock sounded again, slightly louder and a little more desperate, she was tempted to get up and tell him to come in; tempted, but too chicken to actually do it.

The creaking of her door opening was what almost did her in. She did nothing physically, but mentally she was doing somersaults.

"Lily?"

His whisper cut through her like a severing charm through butter.

"Lily, please, are you awake?" he whispered again.

She couldn't talk to him again tonight, she just couldn't. She'd almost let too much slip. She'd almost gone too far.

A sigh came from over near the door and she heard it creek closed slightly, but not fully. She almost turned over until she realized that he'd not actually left the room, but was making his way over to her bed. If she had been frozen before, now she was statuesque.

He sat softly on the floor next to the bed, leaning back on it so she felt the mattress move where his head was, and he stayed still there for a few minutes in the silence. After a short while Lily realized that she'd actually have to breathe sometime, or else he'd either know she was awake and faking sleep, or think she was dead… It was a bit of a strain but she did it. _In and out_…with only a slight juddering.

And then there was silence no more.

"I'm sorry Lily." His voice was so breathy. "I…you were right, I should at least try and understand, even though I might never actually understand anything when it comes to you. I just…it just makes me feel so…so angry and bloody frustrated when I can see all this bad happening to you, and you don't seem to realize just how bad it all is." He shifted slightly and ran a hand through his already quite messy hair.

"I remember the night you showed up here, all covered in blood and soaked through from crying. I don't think you understand how awful that was to see…how it made me feel to look at you in that state, knowing only half of what you'd just been through. But you know what made it all easier? Knowing that you were out of there and away from it and feeling like I was doing something to protect you and keep you safe."

There was another long pause here where Lily had to remind herself to breath again.

"I'm sorry for making you upset again Lily. Merlin knows it's like breaking a leg every time I see you crying." Here he made a soft chuckling noise. "Typical bloke, right?"

She wanted to agree with him. She wanted to nod her head and thank him for the apology but still couldn't bring herself to do it.

Suddenly she felt his weight disappear from the side of the bed. "I know you're sleeping and won't hear any of this but I had to apologize out loud, you know…well, I don't suppose you do know, seen as though you're probably dreaming of some muggle movie star right now, right? Yeah, I'm probably right."

He shuffled slowly to the door and opened it again with a creak. "Well then, I'll leave you to it. I'll see you in the morning when I'll apologize again, but it'll sound nothing like this because…well, things are harder to say when you're listening…and looking at me…goodnight Lily."

It was a good minute or two after she heard the door's soft click shut and the fading steps down the hall when Lily finally rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling.

---

**If you could leave a review that'd be swell X) **


	6. Chapter 6

**So I know I took far too long updating the last chapter so to say sorry... TADARR!!! Chapter 6 XD **

---

The next morning was slightly strange…

When Lily did eventually surface there were too many people around for James to say anything (apparently both the Prewitt twins and nana (!) had had too much to drink and had spent the night). There were some very awkward moments when they both came face to face and it looked as though James would say something…but then someone else would interrupt and they'd both shy off quickly.

Eventually he caught up with her in the courtyard, hanging out some washing for his mother.

"Lily…"

She didn't face him but sucked in a rather large breath. "I know what you're going to talk about and it's ok, I'm sorry too."

James stood stock still for a moment with his hand in his hair. "What?"

"I said I'm sorry too." she repeated with a glance at him over her shoulder. "I shouldn't have gotten so angry, you shouldn't have been such a pig" she shot him another, rather amused glance "so let's just forget about it, yeah? Lets not force each other to make long winded and unnecessary apologies just for the sake of it."

"Erm…" He'd had the whole speech jotted out in his head, including a couple of scenarios in case she got upset again, but he definitely hadn't been expecting her to tell him to forget about it, any of it. "Are you sure?"

Now she turned round and put her hands on her hips. "Do you want to be in the dog house? Is your incessant need to be in some sort of trouble clouding your judgement?" she asked playful, rolling her eyes. "I suppose I could shout if you need me to, but I can't really be bothered."

He couldn't help but laugh; she looked so incredibly…Lily, stood there with her hands on her hips and her red hair flying around her face in the wind. A little relieved he shrugged. "Nah, you're alright."

Now she smiled and threw a pair of what looked like Sirius' boxers at him. "Now give me a hand yeah? I know they've just been washed but you still never know!"

He held the shorts by the corner as far away from himself as possible and joined Lily at the washing line.

* * *

There were three days before the start of school and the three seventeen year olds were making the most of what summer there was left. The sun had stayed hot so they spent the majority of their time outdoors and out of Mrs Potter's way. _She_ had taken to squawking "If you leave your packing to the last minute don't think I'll be sending you what you've forgotten!" and "Where are your Quidditch gloves? Have you found your other grey sock yet? Will you please empty your trunk of rubbish before you fill it up again!" and "I despair, I really do. There'll be pandemonium when you're not ready and the train leaves without you!"…

* * *

It was a Thursday and they were out by the lake. It wasn't part of the Potter's estate, just out of the very lower garden's gate, but James had always adopted it as his own.

The big gnarly oak which had a thick branch that hung over the water provided much needed shade for a very bare chested and very warm Sirius, as Lily lay on a towel in the sun reading a book and James was immersed in some very serious looking cloud watching, as warm and bare chested as his best friend.

Sirius smiled at the scene. This summer had probably been the best he'd ever had, even with the dramatics of what had gone on. He'd never really felt a part of a real family before now, always feeling outside it all when it came to the Potter's; that is until Lily came. Now he was just like her and he liked to know he wasn't alone. Even though he knew the situation between her and his best friend, he also knew she'd never abandon him; she'd always be there for him, just like James.

He suddenly got to his feet and headed over to her. "Come on Lily!"

"Wha…"

But she didn't have much time to ask. He bent down, grabbed her by the arm and lifted her to her feet before dragging her to the waters edge.

"Sirius, don't you dare!" she yelled, seeing _that_ look in his eyes.

"Sorry Lil, my minds been made up." he quipped before launching both her and himself into the cool water.

It was like plunging into bliss; the cold rush around his hot body was indescribable. When they surfaced he felt a very wet slap to his chest.

"You prat! I can't believe you!"

He couldn't help but laugh as he wiped his water clogged hair from his eyes. "Really? I would have thought you'd expect me to do it at some point today?"

She made a growling noise in the back of her throat as she turned in the water to face James who was on the shore laughing his backside off. "What the hell do you think you're laughing about?!"

"Nothing." he said back, trying to keep his face straight as he viewed her, sodden, red and angry.

Then Sirius grabbed her again. He put his face next to hers and she felt hot breath on her ear. "Lets make Prongs jealous."

"What?" she asked, her eyes searching his mischievous face for a few moments before she was being pulled further and further into the middle of the lake, and away from a very puzzled looking James.

"Sirius, what they hell are you doing?" she asked when they stopped, treading water in one spot.

He shrugged and grinned as he helped her stay afloat. "What's Prongs doing?" he asked quietly, as he had his back to the shore.

"Why?"

"Just tell me, alright?"

She rolled her eyes and looked over to the boy on the lakes edge, then back at Sirius. "He's sitting up, watching his crazy best friend, that's what he's doing."

He nodded. "And does he look angry?"

She squinted her eyes, trying to make out the expression on James' face. When she figured it out her stomach jolted. "He looks…"

"Jealous?" asked Sirius innocently.

"No…" she replied, a little too quickly and taking her eyes from him. "He just looks…confused, that's all."

"He's jealous then." stated Sirius.

Lily didn't reply, she just shook her head and tried to put a little distance in between her and Sirius (though not too much as she wasn't the strongest of swimmers).

Sirius though, had other ideas and swam towards her. "Don't go too far yeah, we need a chat."

"A chat?" she asked, secretly thankful when he grabbed her and held her up; her legs were tiring.

"Yes my good friend, a chat…about _James_."

She knew she had automatically blushed but tried to act nonchalant. "What about James?"

He rolled his eyes this time and chuckled, "Are you two going to get together anytime this century or what?" She mumbled something toward the surface of the water which he didn't hear, though he didn't really need to. Seeing she was tiring a little he grabbed her waist and pulled her toward him. "Put your legs round me yeah? I'll support us both."

"Sirius…"

"I'm not gonna try anything Lily, don't worry! Do you really think I've got a death wish with Captain Jealousy stood over there?" he gestured towards the shore where James was now scowling at the scene before him. "I'm already pushing it as it is!"

She relaxed as he held her legs in place about his waist and put her arms loosely around his shoulders. "Thanks."

He grinned. "No, thank you." That eared him a slap to the back at which he laughed. "Now then, back to business! You and James…"

"I don't know what you want me to tell you Padfoot."

"Did you just call me Padfoot?" he asked incredulously.

She shook her head slightly "Sorry, err I mean Sirius. God I'm so used to hearing _him_ call you it that I'm saying it myself…_scary_."

"Yes, yes it was scary…please don't do it again." he replied seriously.

They were quiet for a few minutes as Lily watched a piece of broken reed pass them.

"Do you want it to happen?" asked Sirius suddenly, though soft and without his usual sarcasm.

"Sirius…"

"I'll not tell him Lily, do you think I'd do that? Look, I can tell he's head over heels for you again, ok? And as his best friend I need to know if I'm going to be picking up broken pieces of Potter about the place when he _eventually_ makes a move and you tell him to get on his broomstick."

She inadvertently rested her forehead on his bare collarbone and exhaled. "Why'd you have to bring me out into the middle of a lake to ask this?"

He shrugged and smiled. "Would I have done it any other way?"

"Probably not." she replied with a soft snigger.

"Well?" he prompted.

"Its difficult Sirius…I…we…ugh!" she let out a frustrated grunt. "I should _not_ be talking to you about this!"

"Yes or no Lily, yes or no. They're both very little words and you'll not hear anything on the subject from me again afterwards I promise…and neither will Prongs, you've got my word. Do you want something to happen between you and him? Yes or no."

After a couple of agonizing breaths she finally willed her lips to move and whispered "Yes."

He grinned into the silence before feeling her lifting her head from his collarbone; he had the decency to straighten his face and not look too amused. When her eyes connected with his they were full; full of worry, panic, horror, pleading, everything she was feeling and for a second he could see why James was so taken.

"_Please_ Sirius."

"I'll not breathe a word from now on about it, promise."

Suddenly a voice sounded from the shore. "Padfoot!"

A grin appeared on the face of the aforementioned Padfoot. "Ooh he sounds mad."

She shook her head as she slipped out of his arms and began treading water on her own again. "Let's go back yeah?"

"Missing him already?" he asked slyly.

"Sirius Black I swear you're dead if you so much as hint at it!" she warned with a very fierce finger waggle.

He held his hands up as if to surrender. "Not even if we're alone? It could be our new thing!"

"NO!"

"Alright…"

They began to make their way in the direction of James who was now stood at the shore watching with the most _I-am-so-not-amused_ face he could muster. Feeling slightly mutinous and very giddy from her confession Lily dove onto Sirius' back and pushed him under the water.

When he came back up spluttering he laughed that laugh that sometimes reminded Lily of a dogs bark. "Getting me back?"

"Of course." she replied amusedly as she swam past him.

"You do know I'm now going to get _you_ back, don't you?"

She nodded, preparing herself, "I do know that, yes."

She felt his hands grab her shorts and she suddenly plummeted downwards into the cool murky water again. Truth be told it felt refreshing to have the water rushing around her warm blushing face. When she came to a stand still a meter or so below the surface of the water she instinctively kicked out her legs to shoot back up.

…But she didn't go anywhere.

Something colder than the water around her had latched itself onto her ankle.

She automatically opened her eyes in panic and kicked her legs frantically; trying to dislodge what ever had hold of her. Down in the murky depths she saw shadows moving slowly as another something grasped at her other ankle, though she managed to kick it away before it got a good grip, dislodging the first enough for her to make a break for the sky above her.

Sirius had been wondering why Lily was still beneath the water and was a little relieved when she broke the surface, only to realize something was very wrong. "Lily?"

She managed a breath above the water before bobbing below again. Another swift kick gave her enough time to gasp at the air "_Grindylows, Sirius_." before she could do nothing but be pulled under once more by grabbing, clutching hands.

Sirius tried grabbing her wrists; he got hold of one as well; for all of two seconds. He automatically groped for his wand in his waistband but to his horror it wasn't there (it was laid in a grove of the oak tree which he had earlier proclaimed as his special wand holding tree to the amused faces of his friends).

He dove under the water again forcefully and could see Lily struggling to fight off three or four grindylows, her eyes open with determination and mouth closed to keep in her breath of air. When he saw he couldn't do anything without his wand he went for the surface again.

"Prongs! Grindylows have got Lily, quick! My wand!!!"

James who had been watching with jealously at first, and then confusion, cursed the day Sirius was born, grabbed his wand (and the one from the tree), flung his glasses on the grass and dove headfirst into the water, though he didn't have time to marvel at how refreshing and blissful the cool water felt.

Panic thumping in his ears, James swam for his life and didn't bare his best friend a second glance before diving down into the depths, only one thing occupying his mind; Lily.

She was tiring, he could see that, and the four green, ugly looking creatures were tugging her further down. He had both his and Sirius' wands in his hands and let rip with as many jinxes as his mind could come up with. He hit one of the grindylows square in between its beady little eyes and it hurtled in the opposite direction. The other three seemed a bit reluctant to hold on after that and it wasn't long before James was heading towards the surface with Lily clutching onto him loosely.

"Lily?! Lily are you ok?" asked Sirius straight away as they all finally breathed in the late summer air.

For a second she was silent, until she began coughing violently, her body wrapped around James as he swam with determination toward the shore.

"It's alright Lily, I've got you, ok? You're ok now." muttered James into her sodden hair as she heaved and spluttered, trying to get enough oxygen into her lungs.

Sirius followed quickly behind.

When they got to the shore James lifted her out of the water and placed her down onto the towel she'd been sunbathing on before. She was still coughing and her chest was heaving up and down but she kept a hold of James' shoulders.

"Lily, are you ok? Are you hurt anywhere?" He ran his hands over her legs and feet, searching for anywhere that might cause her any pain but she shook her head and collapsed back onto the towel from exhaustion, only to have to reach back up again as James launched himself at Sirius who'd sat next to them on the grass.

"How could you be so bloody stupid!" yelled James, reaching for his best friends neck.

"James no!" croaked Lily, grabbing his shoulder and lamely tugging.

"Mate I didn't…"

"She could have died you idiot!" growled James, though he didn't go for him again but sat back over Lily, wiping water from his forehead and eyes.

"I didn't know there were bloody grindylows in there!" said Sirius in his defence, not at all surprised by his best mates reaction, though he was just glad Lily was alright.

"Neither did I James." Lily whispered to him, rubbing a hand over his shoulder. "And I dunked him first."

"What the hell were you doing anyway?!" he asked hotly.

She looked up into his face and smiled slightly, despite the fact that he was angry and that she just nearly drowned. "You look funny without your glasses."

He scowled for only a couple of seconds more before he _had_ to smile along with her. "Thanks."

Relieved he'd stopped looking angrily at her she slumped against the floor again and breathed deeply. "Air is nice, air is good…air is my friend."

"You nut job." whispered Sirius exchanging an amused glance with her.

"Shut up, _Padfoot_." she replied and laughed when he scrunched up his face.

James shook his head and finally relinquished his position above Lily, making himself comfortable on the grass right next to her. "What the hell just happened?" he asked, to no one in particular.

"You just saved Lily's life, you did mate…" replied Sirius from the other side of her with a smug twinge in his voice. "She owes you." He added a silent wink to Lily who shot him a warning glance.

---

**So guys, even though it's a little shorter than previous chapters :S ...am I forgiven?**

**Aaaaaaaand I've been a good girl :) the next chapter is in the process of... **

**Now come one!!! That's gotta be worth a review, yes? xxx Muchos LOVE! xxx**


	7. Chapter 7

**Wow! what a fantastic responce for my last chapter! Seriously guys, you reviewers are awesome!! Every single one of you! And yeah, I'm over the 50 mark now too. Which made me deleriously happy!! THANKYOU ALL!!**

**So here we go, chapter 7 X) enjoy xx**

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"He's a bad influence on you."

Lily scrunched her nose as she smiled that smile which made her eyes twinkle with mischief. She was currently squatting against a wall, peering round a corner with James stood above her.

"You're just jealous coz me and Pads thought this up and you didn't." she whispered back.

"Am not." James countered.

"Child." she muttered as she returned her eager gaze to beyond the corner she was concealed around, a hand to her mouth as she chewed absently on a fingernail.

Eventually, Sirius Black appeared from a doorway, walking very swiftly and giving the thumbs up. When he rounded the corner he flattened himself against the wall and let out a sigh. "The fox is in the hen house."

The smile that spread across Lily's face was wide and mesmerizing. "Operation 'bugger it all' is set in motion! Good work agent Pads." She put a congratulative hand on Sirius' shoulder and gave him a swift nod.

He responded by standing straight and saluting. "I am but a pawn in your devious and wicked scheme, Major Red, Sir."

"Oh hell, you've got code names?!" James asked in an unbelieving tone. "_Code names_?!"

"Sshh!" Lily scolded, checking around the corner swiftly. "Come on, we best leave. I can't have anyone see me near here."

Sirius grinned. "Minx."

"Go." she urged as she pushed him, trying not to smile. "And you too James. It wouldn't do for someone to see _you_ around here either."

"What exactly is it that you two have done?"

"Nothing!" said Sirius in that 'I'm obviously lying and want you to know it' voice.

When he turned to Lily for answers she shrugged and urged them further along the corridor and up some stairs.

---

"So, how's operation 'bugger it all' coming along?" asked Remus in his patented conversational tone as he plonked himself on a sofa next to Sirius.

"How do _you _know about it?!" asked James, still a little put out that no one had bothered to tell him exactly what operation 'bugger it all' was, and what it was for.

"It's going brilliantly!" beamed Sirius, ignoring James and smiling serenely. "Especially with Major Red on board! Permission from the Head Girl! You've got to take advantage of situations like this Moony my lad. Grab 'em by the balls and squeeze!"

"Err…" Remus raised one of his thick light brown brows into a high arch and shifted slightly in his seat. "And you Lily, err I mean, Major Red…will you be grabbing balls and squeezing?"

"Not today Remus, not today." she replied from behind her Witch Weekly magazine in a quiet but serious tone.

"She's taking the day off." whispered Sirius cheekily with a wink.

---

Everything had started at the beginning of term (which was only two weeks ago) and with the introduction of the new Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher: Professor Volskin. He was a tall foreboding man, skinny and ill looking with sallow skin and dark circles round his eyes (the sort that made his eyes seem set too far back into his head). He would have been the archetypal muggle vampire if not for his very pale, very blond hair which he kept slicked down and neat, the same as his regimented and trim little moustache.

Within the space of half a lesson it was very clear to anyone with half a brain, and half an eye, that Professor Volskin did not like children, teenagers or in fact teaching. What he did like, however, was the dark arts and what niggled at Lily as she sat in her very first DADA lesson of her final year at Hogwarts was how he managed to get a job like this in the first place.

"Professor Volskin is a very capable man who is very skilled in dark art detection and defence." Was Professor McGonagall's answer when Lily desperately tried to make her see how wrong he was for the job. This was after she'd counselled four terrified first years, a third year who swore never to step foot in another DADA lesson again, the entire fifth year class who had received him in a particularly menacing mood one morning _and_ reprimanded a group of sixth year Slytherin's who were using curses which, they informed her, they'd learnt from him.

"But Professor, it's so very difficult to _learn_ anything from a man who is so very clearly against teaching."

McGonagall, who looked strained yet sympathetic, her slightly lined face looking more drained and older than Lily had ever seen it, answered after a tired sigh. "Miss Evans…Lily dear, if you've got a complaint you should really take it up with Professor Dumbledore, seen as though you're Head Girl this year and report primarily to him. But between you and I, Albus had trouble finding _anyone_ to want to teach here this year; well anyone really willing to anyway. Under normal circumstances he would have gone further a field and found someone a little more suited, yes, but everything is a little strained at the moment, as I'm sure you understand."

Lily had felt completely and utterly fobbed off after that meeting with her head of house. Professor McGonagall must have known there was no way Lily was going to go to Dumbledore and tell him that he was wrong; though James was threatening to do just that as he really couldn't handle dealing with anymore sobbing first year girls.

And that was when something else popped into her mind…something else entirely.

That's when she sought out Sirius.

---

It was a funny feeling that he didn't like very much at all; feeling as though he'd been left out of something brilliant. The only other person who didn't seem to know what was going on behind concealed whispers and knowing looks was Peter. James then decided that he would never keep anything from Peter ever again, like he and Sirius had tended to do in the past, because feeling left out was not fun in the slightest.

There were odd remarks such as "Did you get it?" and "So it works then?" being thrown around him and he felt confused and dizzy trying to figure it all out without any other clues as to what operation 'bugger it all' entailed.

Cornering Lily late one evening coming out of the Head Rooms he finally broke.

"Now you're going to tell me what you guys are planning and you're going to tell me everything." he said in what he hoped sounded like a menacing voice.

Lily had stopped dead in front of him, hugging some Charms books to her chest and sizing him up with wide eyes. "James…"

"No, don't James me! Three days you guys have been planning something behind my back and I want to know what it is!"

She sighed and gave him a little half smile. "We're not planning 'behind your back' James. We're just…you'll see."

"No, I don't want to see! Tell me." He held his voice firm and stepped closer to her. He admired the way she didn't shy away from his intense stare or the fact that he now kind of towered over her.

"Tomorrow." she answered, just as steadily, perhaps too steadily; as if she was desperately trying to control it. "You'll see tomorrow."

"Lily?"

She had to move then. That pleading in his voice, the softening of his eyes and the letting go of his towering posture made something rise through her chest. "Just wait ok?" she replied as she headed for the door, not looking at him and almost failing to keep that control in her voice. "It's nothing bad I promise, well not to you anyway. Just…please?"

He turned to see her in the doorway, looking straight at him with pleading in _her_ eyes now and he relented. How could he not? After she'd left with that small half smile he sat in one of the high backed chairs and let out a long suffering sigh. He really couldn't believe how pathetic he could be when it came to her. If he'd have confronted Sirius- which in hindsight he should really have done- then he would have either beaten it out of him or at least hexed him a good few times for good measure.

---

So the next day came and it was obvious something was about to go down, or off, or something, because Sirius was humming to himself in the bathroom and ended up spraying a very bleary eyed Remus with toothpaste as he belted out a line of the tune he was humming.

"Ugh your disgusting!" mumbled Remus as he trudged over to the shower.

"'Gu 'uv me 'erly" was Sirius' reply before he spat and began humming the chorus again.

Sat at the breakfast table twenty minutes later, James watched Lily carefully but she showed no outward signs of any sort of anticipation as she dutifully ignored Sirius' sly comments and spontaneous giggles. He couldn't help but think she was very good at masking the truth and putting on a show.

Nothing had happened by morning break time and James was wondering if anything was going to happen at all, although Sirius did look as though he was about to wet himself in anticipation and Remus looked as though he'd wet himself trying not to laugh at Sirius.

Just as break was almost over, and Sirius had collared Lily and was whispering furiously into her ear, a small band of first years appeared and headed to them.

"Lily?" said the smallest one, giving Sirius a look of trepidation.

"Annie what's up?" she looked at the others and frowned instinctively. "What's wrong with Natty?"

The half sized human Lily was referring to had her hands over her face and was making sniffing noises. James instinctively took a step back, needing to get as far away from the crying first year as possible (having developed a phobia after over exposure).

"We had Defence Against the Dark Arts this morning and…and…"

"_Dammit_ that's **it**!" Lily suddenly blurted out, startling the three so they jumped and stared at her with wide childlike eyes. "I've **had it** with him!"

Sirius was grinning widely. "Operation 'bugger it all'?" he asked innocently.

She held him with a fierce stare, which made him look slightly uncomfortable, before answering with an order. "Do it Padfoot. Just do it."

"Yes!" Sirius pumped a fist in the air and then took off down the hall cackling as he went.

Lily took a second to recover and turned to the first years who looked thoroughly confused. "Don't worry you guys. Get to your next lesson and forget everything that transpired here, ok? Not a word, _to any one_. Clear?"

The one called Annie nodded and the other two followed suit before leaving and muttering between themselves.

"You need to find Peeves." Remus suddenly said as he laid a hand on Lily's shoulder.

"Shit, yes I do." she replied and looked around quickly, catching James' eye. For a split second she looked almost scared- but only for a split second, the smile which shone from her face the second after overshadowed anything from before.

Then she left.

---

Both Sirius and Lily were late for Transfiguration, but showed up separately. Professor McGonagall nodded and accepted Lily's excuse of being caught up by first year woes, but stared sceptically at Sirius with his excuse of an exploding toilet and needing to change his pants.

Lily looked fraught, completely different to the picture of calm she had been at breakfast and Sirius seemed to be encouraging her from across the room with obscure faces and random hand gestures.

Then, just as the professor was about to go into the highly dangerous act of Transfiguring humans into other living creatures, James' quill began to rattle on the table in front of him. For a second he watched it with a frown on his face but then realization hit him and he glanced up to his best friends beaming face, and then to Lily who looked as though she would either explode or throw up…or both.

Everyone in the room had noticed the low rumbling which was now shaking the tables themselves, though very slightly and making random objects on shelves rattle perilously towards their demise.

McGonagall frowned over her NEWT class and looked up to the ceiling, as that was where the sound seemed to be coming from. Indeed, the ancient looking chandelier that hung from the wooden beam in the middle of the Transfiguration room was vibrating slightly, starting to sway back and forth as a bit of dislodged dust drifted down toward the students.

Lily lifted a steady hand. "Professor?" she asked, with just the right amount of concern. (James was impressed. Very impressed)

McGonagall waved her hand in front of her in answer to Lily's questioning tone. "Just hold here a minute, won't you?" then she headed to the door and stuck her head out into the corridor.

The rumbling got louder as the door was opened and Lily automatically got out of her seat and followed her teacher, beckoning James to come with her. "Professor, should we go see what's happening?" she asked, her face as straight as a die.

McGonagall had wandered slightly down the second floor corridor and was guardedly looking towards the entrance to the moving staircases, and at the staircase that would certainly lead to the third floor corridor where the noise was coming from.

"Professor?" asked James too, his wand out, just in case. He noticed that Lily had eyed it and given him a little smile.

"Erm, yes…err, yes please, that is…we'll all go up together and see what's going on." was McGonagall's slightly harassed sounding answer. She turned back into her classroom and addressed the class with a harsh tone. "Stay here and don't move! We shall be back momentarily. Mr Black, behave yourself!" she added eyeing him suspiciously.

They climbed the staircase in silence and Professor McGonagall hesitated at the top for just a second. The rumbling was louder up here, and it was very obviously coming from the Defence Against the Dart Arts classroom, though the door to the room was shut.

As well as the rumbling they were now able to hear other noises too. Pops and bangs, scraping and snarls…yelling and screaming.

McGonagall blasted the door off its hinges in order to get to what sounded like a circus gone mad and unleashed hell onto the corridor they were in. Creatures burst from the classroom, snarling biting creatures, banging into walls, digging clawed feet into the wooden floor. They weren't any sort of creature the Gryffindor head of house could identify but she didn't really have much time to think.

"Contain them!" she shouted back to the Head Boy and Girl behind her as she began to draw up a ward around them. The only problem was that any ward she attempted to conjure fizzled out before it got close.

James looked questioningly at Lily who was stood watching with a small smirk on her face. He turned round to see Sirius, Remus and Peter behind, with the rest of the NEWT class and some other students too, obviously come to see what the commotion was about. Lily then motioned for him to turn back and watch the doorway.

Professor Volskin ran from his classroom screaming in quite an uncharacteristically high voice. His hands were flailing about him in all sorts of directions and soon it was clear to see why. Wood-nymphs. Not just any sort of wood-nymphs though, but the North Highland wood-nymphs he'd kept in the cupboard and taunted as he thought his second and third years about them. The ones that had looked as though they wanted to bite off his fingers when he waved them too close to their cage. But now it looked as though they were trying to get a hold of his ears and his robes and he was trying everything to get them away from him. The only trouble was that he didn't have his wand…someone else did. Someone who was hovering back in the classroom singing rude songs and throwing books at him: Peeves.

McGonagall looked stricken as she ran down the corridor after the Professor, trying to get him to calm down as she collected the devilishly hard to catch nymphs. The creatures who had first burst from the room were now nowhere to be seen and all that was left was a big cloud of dust, random floating pages of damaged books and the rumbling giggles beginning to surface from the spectators left in the corridor.

James looked to Lily who wasn't laughing but looked satisfied with what had just occurred although Sirius, however, was giving himself entirely away, the grin on his face was from ear to ear as he viewed the devastation about him.

"Well?" he asked loftily.

James was confused. "Well what?"

"Well…how do you think she did? I thought it was pretty cool for her first try." Sirius was now looking at Lily like a proud father though she wasn't taking much notice.

James looked about him, searching for the words. "Erm…it was…"

"Chaos!"

Everyone spun round to see Mr Filch, the middle aged, scruffy, paranoid caretaker looking as though he'd just been sprung from a funny farm.

"Absolute chaos! Who…how…" he seemed unable to find the words for how he felt about his corridor ending up looking as though a very unsuccessful and very messy bank job had occurred.

At that moment Peeves flew out of the room and lobbed a book at him. It hit Filch precisely on the head and he went down like a sack of potatoes.

"Excellent shot Peeves!" yelled Sirius who whooped and clapped enthusiastically, as did a few others in the hall.

Peeves bent down in a low swooping bow to his applause and then continued off down the corridor, singing in a very haughty voice about wood nymphs, books and hitting people on the head.

"Marry me Evans!" Sirius suddenly blurted out to wolf whistles from some of their classmates.

She eyed him for a moment before turning to leave. "Sod off."

He laughed loudly as she disappeared from view, leaving everyone to discuss whichever rumours they cared to; they'd all be around the school by lunchtime anyway. When she'd gotten out of earshot of all the murmuring of the crowd she stopped and leant against the cold stonewall, exhaling loudly.

Now she knew what it felt like to cause a little bit of chaos and it kind of felt pretty good if she was honest. The rush of figuring out a plan and then the dedication it took to see it through. She'd had to work out some pretty interesting charms in order to create the beasts that had been let loose in the DADA classroom, then figure out how to make it so magic wouldn't work on them before Peeves had managed to get a hold of his wand. The crazy mistreated wood nymphs must have been Peeves' doing, though she would have to congratulate him when she next ran in to him.

She hadn't meant any actual harm to come to Professor Volskin. She just wanted to teach him a bit of a lesson of her own. She'd had enough of people making themselves superior to others by breaking them down. She'd had enough of the sort of people who made others feel unworthy. She'd had enough of bullies. And that is what Volskin was, through and through…a bully.

So lost in her thoughts, Lily didn't hear the slow footsteps approaching till she was aware of two figures, one stood awfully close, the other a little further away. Raising her eyes from the floor her stomach felt like it had been plunged into a bucket of ice.

"Well now, Sev, 'aint this your girl?"

She shot Severus Snape a quick glance but returned it quickly to the guy who'd just spoken; Rosier…a fellow seventh year, the one stood closest. "What is it you want Rosier?"

He sneered a little…that may have been his smile, she wasn't quite sure. "Now is that any way to greet your best friend Evans? Surely even you mudblood's have better manners than this?"

She didn't rile at the use of the word mudbood…_that_ she was used too, and besides, really it was just a word…it didn't exactly hurt when someone said it. What did boil her blood though was Rosier's assumption that she had anything to do with Severus Snape anymore. "We have better manners than to invade other peoples personal space actually, so if you wouldn't mind stepping back a little…I don't care much for your taste in aftershave."

He didn't step back and he didn't stop sneering. "You got a little more ballsy over the holidays you did Evans…Potter been giving you lessons in how to be up your own backside?"

She noticed Severus shuffle a little at the mention of James' name. She knew he wouldn't be too pleased with the idea of her having spent almost the entirety of the summer holidays with the two guys he hated the most…not that it was any of _his_ business that she did. He gave up the right to have an opinion on the company she kept when he publicly showed his true Slytherin colours in front of everyone at the end of their fifth year.

"What is it you want Rosier?" she repeated, her voice taking on a stern edge.

He leant in a little closer and enjoyed watching her flatten herself against the wall completely. "I don't know Evans…what would you be willing to do for me?"

She might have kicked him in the balls if it wasn't for the appearance of someone else in the small space of the corridor. Jason. Jason Reeves… she sighed an ever so small sigh of relief.

"Can I help you at all, Rosier?" he asked pointedly.

Rosier straightened up and shot him a bored glance. "Well look here…what will you do Reeves? Throw a book at me?"

Jason rolled his eyes. He was always so cool with every kind of situation, never letting anything really faze him. That had been one of the reasons Lily had fallen for him in her sixth year…and one of the reasons she'd had to end it too. "What an insult. I'm astounded and a little taken aback. Well done. Now seriously, leave her alone."

Rosier clucked his tongue. "Coming to the rescue huh? Didn't you know Potter's finally got his claws into this one?"

Jason blinked at the mention of James but insisted "Rosier…"

"Come on Severus, its awfully crowded here all of a sudden."

Severus Snape didn't look Lily in the eyes as he followed dutifully behind Rosier and out of sight. She stared at his back, until he disappeared. She never thought she would look at Severus with anything other than kindness and understanding…now all she felt was loathing and pity…he could be more than what he'd chosen to be.

"Lily?"

She snapped back to reality as she looked into the inquisitive face staring back at her in concern. "Hey Jason." Running a hand through her hair she breathed out noisily, "Thanks…"

He shrugged and shot a glance to where the two Slytherin's had left. "Forget about it. They're low life's."

"I know." she reassured him with a polite smile. "They don't really bother me…they just caught me off guard I suppose."

"Aaahh yes…you wouldn't have been contemplating that little stunt you just pulled in the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom, would you?"

Lily pursed her lips and cocked her head to the side, sizing him up. "What stunt would that be then?"

Jason laughed and put his hands in his pockets. "They've sure done a number on you!"

Again she eyed him with slight suspicion. "You'd think, huh?!"

He rolled his eyes and shook his head, though he was still smiling. "So, I'm glad I ran into you actually…"

Warning bells started to go off in her head though she kept her polite façade.

"…I'm having trouble getting my head around that charms project and as I recall…you were pretty shit hot at charms." he finished with a wide grin.

Charms help…she should have known.

"I still am!" she answered with a grin back as they slowly meandered down the corridor in the general direction of the library, settling into idle chitchat and lighthearted laughter.

---

James had shown up after the Slytherin's had gone…when it was just Lily and Jason in the corridor…talking…smiling…walking away together and laughing…

He ran a shaky hand through his hair and leant his back against the cold stonewall behind him, slowly lowering himself to the floor.

---

**Please guys, if you could just take the minute it takes to click the 'review this chapter' button and leave a few words I would be more than extatic! I reply to every review, and every fave n alert too X) the way I see it, if you take the time to write a review, I can take the time to thank you personally.**

**xxx becks xxx**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys!!! Sorry for the brief wait for this...it didn't come to me till late last night (I mean 1am late, eek) **

**Just have to say the BIGGEST THANKYOU to all you wonderful people who took a minute out to review all the previous chapters! I can't tell you how much it means to me, to recieve just a little note telling me your thoughts. If you haven't reviewed yet then please, I do reply to everyone and all thoughts are welcome xxx**

**You all know this, but I'll say it again anyway... these characters and the world in which they live does not belong to me... if they did I'd be rich X) **

**Enjoy...**

---

A week in the life of Sirius Black never used to be this stressful. A week in the life of Sirius Black used to smell of roses; roses, Brentleworths Best Blackest Than Black Writing Ink and, on occasion, dung bombs. _Now_? Now a week in the life of Sirius Black had him pulling his hair out. He had even gotten so stressed with the dramas of his best friend that he felt like he'd forgotten what it was like to have a life…not to mention a love life, of his own.

He couldn't fathom how two people could get so much, so wrong, in such a short period of time. All he knew is that he was almost to the point of locking his best friend and the object of said best friends affections in a room until they had no choice but to either confess all and get on with it…or kill each other…and then him…in that order.

It began, as most weeks do, with Monday…

Sirius had let himself be dragged into the library by an uncharacteristically quiet James. They settled themselves into their favourite seats in the quidditch section and began their weekly trawl of the shelves for fancy tackles they could master before their next practice, having vowed to come up with a new one every week to keep their team mates on their toes…or they would have been trawling the books, if James hadn't have spotted something which automatically made him ball his fists.

On one of the more public tables in the library was Lily, bent over a rather large book. Around her sat four other 7th year students, all Ravenclaw's. Sirius scowled as he recognised the Ravenclaw sat next to Lily; the one who James was now shooting daggers at.

"Jason '_friggin_' Reeves. What's Lily doing with that prat?"

He didn't receive an answer but Sirius could all but hear the grinding of James' teeth. Guessing the jist of what James was thinking, he ripped a page from one of the random books laid on the table, screwed it into a ball and chucked it so it hit Lily on the back of the head. She didn't look too pleased when she turned round and saw Sirius beckoning her over and she looked a lot less pleased when she saw that the parchment he'd thrown had just been ripped from a book.

"Sirius Black, did you just take this from there?" she scolded as she held up the crumpled page.

Sirius put on an easy smile and leaned back casually in his chair "Ah, you've found it! I was looking for that…momentarily misplaced it, I did."

"I'll momentarily misplace _you_ if you don't watch it."

"Oh Lily, I love when you get all authorative and head-girly." He sniggered as she stuck her tongue out at him. "What you doin' with _that_ prat anyway?" he nudged his head back to the table where they were being watched by the 'prat' in question.

She glanced over to Jason and then turned back to Sirius putting her hands on her hips. "I'm not doing anything with _Jason_. What I'm doing is helping a few friends with their Charms essays."

Sirius raised his eyebrows and his hands "Alright missy, it was just a question. So long as your only helping with an essay."

At this point she scowled and Sirius could see a flash of annoyance. "What's it to you anyway, if I'm doing more than helping with an essay or not?"

"Well I'd think that would be bleeding obvious, don't you?" answered Sirius calmly.

She quickly glanced at James and went slightly pink through the neck. "I've not got time for this." she mumbled hotly and with that she turned on her heel and headed back to where Jason welcomed her with a wary glance and scowl in their direction.

"Prat." muttered James under his breath.

"Oh, that is very, _very_ true mate."

The rest of that library session, and the rest of that Monday in fact, had passed with James saying nothing but two words to anyone, least of all Sirius. If the truth were known he thought his best mate was overreacting slightly, though he knew Lily could have put James' mind at ease in an instant.

He just hoped Tuesday might see James in a better mood…though he should have known better…

"Do you reckon, you know, that they're going to get back together?"

There was a bit of a traffic jam out of the great hall after breakfast that morning, and Sirius, James, Remus and Peter had gotten themselves caught behind a pair of 5th years wearing blue ties and each carrying what looked like half the library. Usually Sirius didn't listen to the idle gossiping of girls, especially 5th year girls he didn't know the name of, but he had gotten increasingly bored of his best friends lack of communication and couldn't help but overhear.

"Who? Jason and what's-her-face?" asked the slightly goofy brunette looking at her companion with a tilt to her head.

Sirius shot a quick glance at James who had suddenly become very intent on what the two Ravenclaw's were saying.

The first girl who was also wearing a slightly garish woolly hat was speaking again. "I thought they meshed well together."

Sirius knew nothing good would come of James hearing this conversation but there was nowhere else to go, they were stuck. Stupid gossiping 5th year Ravenclaw girls with bad taste in knitted accessories in front and at least fifty or so over eager teenagers trying to all rush in the same direction for fear of being late to their first lessons of the day behind. Perfect. Remus shot Sirius a concerned sort of cringe that irked him. What use was a cringe in such a situation as this? James was about to get his heart stomped on again and all dear old Moony could do was cringe…though it was better than Peter…he still had a bacon sandwich in one hand and was doing all he could to clean the spot of tomato ketchup that'd just splodged down the front of his shirt.

The brunette in front scrunched up her nose and inquired to her friend "What is it about red heads?"

"I don't think it's _all_ red heads, you know…just red heads called Lily Evans. Apparently, Jason says she's hard to put down!"

The two girls then began to titter like sparrows and Sirius had to yank James away if the colour of his face was any indication as to what he was thinking. They almost took out a suit of armour and a couple of up-to-no-good looking 2nd year Hufflepuff's but he managed to get James to safety before he tried to randomly strangle someone with his tie. Peter and Remus were carried away in a sea of students as Sirius flattened himself against the wall, watching his best friend storm away from him and in the total opposite direction they needed to be heading. He figured he'd thank him later…or not…whichever.

Wednesday afternoon found the 7th year students sat at their desks in a defence against the dark arts class. With the sudden resignation of their DADA teacher, they'd been assigned random substitutes to help them shift through the sheer bulk of work they needed to clear for their NEWT's.

This particular DADA lesson was boring the pants off Sirius. He was so bored that he'd even abandoned an extremely ruthless game of hangman with an equally bored Remus, due to the alarming methods of stickman homicide his good friend was thinking up…sometimes Remus scared him a little.

On the other side of the table, James was sending a note over to Lily who was sat at the front of the class. Sirius had seen the first few notes being sent and had watched as James had smiled impishly and scribbled his replies with gusto. Now however, his demeanour had changed slightly and he was frowning as the notes appeared in front of him.

Sirius craned his neck as he tried to see what was being written but James inadvertently shifted so he could see nothing. Remus had caught on to the change in mood too and was eying James suspiciously. Peter, though, had fallen asleep in his chair but went undetected as Remus, being the doting friend he was (and for the fact he couldn't stand the noise), had put a silencing charm on him to stop his loud snoring.

By the time the end of the lesson had rolled around Lily all but stormed out of the classroom as quick as you like, with James trying, and failing, to catch her before she disappeared completely.

"What was that about?" asked Remus casually.

For a second it looked as though James was going to bite Remus' head off, but he managed to deflate a little before replying. "Nothing…we, err…she…nothing."

"Prongs mate?" asked Sirius, putting a friendly hand on his shoulder.

"It's nothing Pads, alright so lets just…drop it."

Sirius shrugged at Remus as James walked away. Really he was getting sick of the sight of the back of his best friends head. With a sigh Sirius turned back into the classroom to wake Peter…lord knew how the guy could sleep through the whole room of students creating a rabble as hey packed up and left but he did.

"Wormtail come on or else Binns will catch you."

Remus sniggered and viewed the sleeping lump behind the desk in front of them. "I doubt Binns would even notice if none of us had have shown up for lesson today. I know I could have been doing a thousand things more productive than sitting here not even pretending to listen." He looked over to where the ghost teacher in question looked a little puzzled at the arrangement of the furniture…clearly forgetting he wasn't in his usual History of Magic classroom.

Remus was right…what a waste of an afternoon.

By the time Thursday had come around Sirius had decided that ignoring the situation, and the silhouette of his crest fallen comrade wasn't working. He needed a new slightly different tactic. So he threw caution to the wind and sucked in some air before plonking himself, rather forcefully, on the sofa next to James who was moodily staring at an open Quidditch stats book and had been for at least half an hour.

"Hey Prongs!"

"Alright Padfoot." was James' bored monotone reply.

Sirius nudged him playfully. "What's up with you mate? Smile, it might never happen!"

James looked up with pitiful eyes. "It already has."

Rolling _his_ eyes Sirius tried to make light of the situation. "Come on then mate, what has she done now?!"

Suddenly James came out of his melancholy state and made a noise like a dying animal. "Agh! Why can't he just piss off and leave her alone?!"

"Ah, we are, are we not, talking about Jason '_friggin_' Reeves?"

"I tried to apologise earlier, right? You know, about the whole misunderstanding and the argument.."

"Hold up, what argument?" asked Sirius confused.

"The notes in Defence yesterday." said James, losing a little of his steam. He rubbed his eyes beneath his glasses and then pinched the bridge of his nose. "We had a bit of an…argument, and I was _trying_ to apologise…but over _he_ saunters, calling her '_Lil_' and staring down her shirt. I could have swung for him. Who interrupts two people having a conversation?!"

"Jason '_friggin_' Reeves, obviously." replied Sirius matter-of-factly.

"I just wish he'd…I don't know…I just wish he'd find someone else to bother."

James finally sunk into the sofa, looking dejected. Sirius hated seeing his best mate this way. "So are you and Lily alright now?"

The hand James lifted wobbled from side to side in a 'so-so' gesture before flopping back down onto his jeans.

"Right." muttered Sirius quietly…

And that was the end of that conversation. It also _seemed _to be the end of the missed communications between Lily and James, because that evening she even joined them all for a bit of a chess wizards tournament…loser having to go to the kitchens to get cakes.

In fact everything on Friday seemed hunky-dory until that evening…

Sirius had been minding his own business, strolling down the sixth floor corridor, doing nothing that came even close to breaking any school rules and especially not humming contentedly to himself in victory over stuffing Regulus into a rather pokey looking cupboard and fixing the lock so it couldn't be opened without a very intricate counter curse.

Not at all.

When suddenly…

"I don't understand how you could think…where you'd even get the idea…!?"

Those were the lovely high-pitched tones of one Lily Evans who was obviously completely flabbergasted. Sirius stepped back into an alcove, knowing that she would pass by him.

"Really? Is it really _**so**_ far fetched." came the reply of an equally distressed sounding James Potter.

Sirius rolled his eyes and braced himself.

"Yes, it _**really**_ is _**that**_ far fetched! What are we doing here, again? Arguing, again! Over nothing, _**again**_!"

James had stopped and Sirius could see him. His shoulders were square and stiff and his hands were balled into fists. This was a very volatile James stood in front of a very volatile Lily who was obviously trying to keep her cool too.

"I just don't know what you want from me!" James finally blurted out.

Lily looked at him a little gone out. "What I _**want**_ from you? What is it that I'm supposed to _**want**_?"

"_**I don't know**_!"

"Erm, hello, err sorry but…" Sirius had just stepped out of the alcove in order to stop them from murdering one another. "…I couldn't help overhearing your conversation and…"

James turned on him now, his anger overflowing. "For Gods sake Padfoot, everything's just one big joke to you!" he half yelled before turning round and storming off out of view.

There was silence in the corridor, as Sirius stood a little shocked that he'd been turned upon so abruptly, and Lily clawed back some of her composure.

Finally Sirius muttered "Well, _he_ won't be getting a best friend of the month award." before looking at Lily who was red in the cheeks and tearing up slightly.

"Do you know what's going on Padfoot? Because I don't have the foggiest."

Sirius would have replied, he might have even given her a hug if she hadn't have walked off quickly in the opposite direction. He might have been annoyed by the fact that he was, yet again, looking at the retreating back of one of his friends, if he didn't feel a little for Lily…who all in all, was pretty much blameless in all this. How did she know James was racked with jealousy…? How did she know James was wracked with _exactly the same_ jealousy that had almost taken over his life in 6th year, when Jason '_friggin_' Reeves had asked Lily to Hogsmead?!

Sirius had gotten lost in his thoughts and wandered to the front entrance of the castle. As he slipped through the small opening of the heavy oak doors the crisp air hit him and a shudder went down his back. He pushed all thoughts of James and Lily out of his mind as he snuck through the courtyard and headed for the bridge that took him out towards the forbidden forest. The sun was no longer visible, but it wasn't completely dark yet so he could see his surroundings clearly.

He knew where he was headed. That was a given. He just hoped the last of the straggling students had headed back indoors, for fear of being caught out of the castle after hours. As he left the confines of the rickety looking wooden bridge he doubled back and ended up underneath it; this was the Marauders spot for a quick transformation before covertly heading out over the grounds.

He had undressed almost completely when he heard footsteps on the dirt by the entrance of the bridge, then the creaking of the wooden slats above his head. "_Shit_." he whispered below his breath as he stood stock-still and automatically cast his eyes above him through a crack in the wood.

He'd recognise that nose anywhere…

"So what if Black gets caught?" sneered Snape in a hushed tone to his companions. There must have been around four, though Sirius didn't get chance to count as his chest had started to pound at the mention of his name.

"If the pip squeak gets caught then it's his fault. He'll not rat on us, Snape. I'll make sure of it." came a gruff reply from one of his cloaked companions.

It made no sense to Sirius why they'd assume he'd not give them up, the dirty rotten Slytherin scum. Of course he would; anything to get those good for nothing evil bastards out of Hogwarts.

"I hope you're going to do something more than just threaten him Mulciber." replied Snape in a bored tone.

The rest of the party sniggered though the one that was Mulciber must have shifted his heavy feet. "Look Snape, just because you thought of this doesn't mean you get too…"

Another higher pitched voice piped up, Sirius was trying his hardest to put a face to it but he couldn't quite remember who it was. "Oh come off it, no fighting amongst the ranks. We'll not be taken seriously if we're fighting amongst ourselves like children."

Snape clucked his tongue. "All I need to know is when the time comes, whether Regulus Black will keep his mouth shut if he gets dragged before Dumbledore, that's all. I doubt the old fool will use anything akin to veritaserum, he's too straight laced for that, but still…he's bound to have other persuasive techniques."

It clicked then, for Sirius. They were talking about his brother. What his younger brother had to do with whatever they'd been planning he didn't know…though they'd have to get him out of that cupboard first…

"It won't get that far Snape, quit your worrying."

"I'm merely trying to cover every angle."

"You sound like a woman…"

"Regulus Black has a lot to lose by crossing us…"

The voices became quieter and quieter as the band of hooded Slytherin's headed towards the castle and presumably down to the dungeons where they resided. Sirius stood stock still for at least ten minutes; going over the conversation he'd heard in his mind. They'd been planning something…but what? Was it just one of those ridiculous plans the Slytherin boys dreamt up every once in a while to show the Gryffindor's who was boss? If so he had absolutely nothing to worry about…those plans never worked properly. But what if it was something more sinister? Something more dangerous?

So many problems, questions and solutions were rolling around in his head that he felt full to the brim of everything. '_When the time comes_' suggested whatever was going to go down, wasn't going to happen tonight, so he granted himself an evening of freedom; the evening he'd had planned since he'd found himself at the mouth of the entrance hall not half an hour previously.

He eventually stripped off to completely nothing and transformed in an instant, slipping effortlessly into his canine alter ego, letting all coherent human thoughts go. Really Padfoot had it easy. No cares about best friends and red heads. No cares about whether he'd finished his essay for McGonagall on time. No cares about cloaked Slytherin's sneaking about and pretending to be important.

A dogs life…that's what Sirius longed for…and for the evening at least, he could have it.

---

It was twilight outside and a half moon was beginning to poke its nose through one of the dormitory windows. Someone had left a window open and the curtains around Remus' bed were flapping slightly. It was probably for the best though…the room had been smelling slightly stale as of late.

James Potter stood in front of one of the one and only mirror and stared transfixed at himself. He hadn't done this in such a long time, but then again he'd not felt the need to. He only ever had to really compare himself to one person, and he thought that person had been kicked to the curb.

Lifting his hand he pressed a finger to the tip of his slightly-too-long nose and pushed, wondering briefly if a shrinking charm wouldn't be completely out of the question; it wouldn't be like in 5th year…he would be better at it now…there'd be no worries of charming his nose right off his face again…

Lily had only ever had one serious boyfriend. James knew he didn't have to worry about all those other jokers who held her attention for all of three weeks before she had come to her senses. But Jason Reeves…something about Jason had captured her for almost an entire school year…and James had hated it.

Surely Jason's hair was too…regimented…and his bottom lip too sticky-outy…

James bit his bottom lip to make it look a little swollen and stuck it out…_no_, he thought with distain, _that looks stupid_.

He knew he wasn't ugly. He _knew_ this. Many girls had sighed at the sight of him in his quidditch robes, he'd _heard_ them! He knew he wasn't as good looking at Sirius, but then again, who was? Sirius had that mysterious aristocratic beauty down to a tee…there had to be at least one perk to being a Black. No, he knew that physically even with his too long nose and his unruly mop of hair, he was still quite desirable…

So that left personality…

Jason was a swot…of course he was a swot he was a Ravenclaw! Though that didn't really mean a thing because James was smart too. Just because he didn't spend all his spare time in the library or at study groups didn't mean he wasn't top in the class at almost everything. Perhaps in the past he'd not been too bothered about his school work…maybe he might have been a little lacksy-daisy with his essay deadlines and general effort in past years but this was NEWT year for pity's sake…he'd booked his idea's up, just like everyone else. Really Jason's 'head start' on him academic wise meant nothing; James would still be able to run rings around him in transfiguration.

He was all together too quiet for James' liking. The sort of bloke who makes you wonder what he's thinking…he was a little like Remus in that regard…without the wicked sense of humour and the general knack of finding himself being led astray and into bother. Maybe it was Jason's narrow eyes that made him look shifty…or James just needing to find fault with him. _James_ on the other hand was _not_ quiet, not in any sense of the word. True, he wasn't as loud and unruly as he used to be, but he was still no angel, and could stand up for himself easily. He knew for a fact that Lily liked this about him. He _knew_ she liked to spend time with him, to laugh and joke with him…they'd done it on so many occasions recently…

He just couldn't get his head round it.

Running a hand through his hair he sighed and set his glasses straight. Surely the only difference between him and Jason 'friggin' Reeves was the latter's lack of sense of humour.

"It's different now." he mumbled to himself, though his words were said with conviction. "I've grown up." As if to punctuate the point he squared his jaw and stared with steely determination. "I'm not giving up without a fight." and with this he swept from the room without a thought or a glance to anything else.

---

Peter just sat looking confusedly at the door where James had disappeared. He knew his entrance into the dormitory had been unnoticed, even the curt little "Hello Prongs." he'd offered in greeting had fallen on deaf ears, but he was banking on James seeing him once he'd finished doing whatever he was doing in the mirror, so it surprised him when James just walked straight past.

He looked about him at the empty room, the bed curtains flapping pathetically, and wondered vaguely where Sirius and Remus were.

---

**Sometimes we don't just recieve physical bruising...**

**Please review X) They make me more determined to update faster xxx**

**Thankyou for reading xxx**


	9. Chapter 9

**Apologies (as always) for the wait. I'v had it rough these past few weeks and well...this story is a little close to the bone for me now after whats been going on in my life :/ but I decided to carry on with it regardless. Thankyou to all you reviewers who make me want to carry on with it...knowing you guys want the next chapter makes me want to finish it. **

**So yes...chapter 9! It wasn't supposed to be quite as long...I had to hold some back off the end and you'll have to wait till the next chapter for it, sorry :S But I hope you enjoy....**

---

The sky surrounding the castle was dull, its clouds baring down on the ancient stone building with intent. Pretty soon there would be the first faint taps of drizzle on the other side of the large plated glass window Lily was now resting against; it was cold on her forehead and it felt refreshing. She could feel a tension headache coming on and couldn't be bothered with the trek to the hospital wing to obtain the potion she'd need to calm it.

There was a dark shape running along the outskirts of the forbidden forest and she watched it absently until it disappeared from view into an opening in the trees; she knew it must be some sort of animal…but things like that didn't phase her anymore.

She missed summer.

She had known things would change, at least a little, when they returned to school, she'd been prepared for it…and at first the changes had been slight and subtle. Now though…now was a different story. Everything seemed to be reverting back to how it had been in sixth year. Now Lily found herself sat alone in the library on many occasions, just because she had nothing better to do. She felt like she would be intruding on something concrete, if she tried to wriggle herself into the boy's gang of marauders, (silently rolling her eyes at her mental use of their childish nickname they liked to use for themselves) and every time she had attempted to approach her two favourite friends with ideas of doing something fun they had either already been busy, it had petered out into boredom for which she had felt responsible, or she ended up in some sort of argument with James…she just couldn't help the niggling suspicion that the past few months had been a bit of a fluke. She couldn't help but begin to think that James and Sirius had _put up_ with her company all summer, because they had had no choice.

She missed summer…and she missed Sirius…and James…she missed James.

She sighed.

---

He _knew_ she'd be there.

Even without the marauders map he knew she'd be sat at her favourite window in the far corner of the library…it was private yet didn't feel claustrophobic. She was tucked up on the deep windowsill, on a cushion she must have conjured, and had a book on her lap, though her thoughts were obviously elsewhere as her head was turned so she could look out of the window at the gloomy sky. James had approached quietly and watched her for a moment, shielded by a stack of unsteady looking books. He didn't like to see her looking so miserable and it made it worse that he was the reason behind it.

When she sighed he couldn't stand it any longer and walked determinedly over, picking up a chair as he went, placing it as close to the window, and her, as he could get it. Lily had looked around and seen him, but determinedly turned back to the window, her jaw set a little tighter than before. He knew he deserved the stony welcome.

"I'm sorry."

She pursed her lips and he wanted to laugh, but didn't…if he was going to get back on her good side he would have to leave the annoying joker James out of it. He lightly touched the hem of her skirt and when she still didn't look down at him he softly touched her ankle.

This time she did look, her head snapping around quickly.

"I'm sorry." he repeated sincerely, holding her gaze.

When she eventually pulled her eyes away from his she looked down to her ankle where his finger had brushed her so lightly.

"I don't understand what happened…"

He should have known she wasn't going to make it easy. "Well…we kind of argued…"

"I know that James." she replied flatly. "What I don't understand is what we were arguing _about_."

"Ah…"

She sighed again and looked down at her hands, which were now on top of the book in her lap. "Everything seemed so much…less _stressed_…over summer…"

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

They sat in silence for a few minutes until James worked up some courage. "Truth is Lily, over summer…there was no…there was no _Jason_, over summer."

"Jason? What the hell has Jason got to do with…" but then it clicked for her. The scolding expression on her face softened. "James? Really? This has all been over _Jason_?"

He knew he blushed. He felt it rising through his neck but he steadied his nerves, and his voice, and stood his ground. "Yes."

She rolled her eyes and swung her legs off the windowsill so she was facing him, resting a foot on his chair. "That's…that's just…James that's stupid." When he didn't answer she sighed. "Jason is a friend, James."

"He might not see it quite like that Lily."

"Who cares how _he_ sees it James! I know I haven't given him any cause to think otherwise ok?"

He glanced at her and when he saw her rather pink cheeks he smiled, he couldn't help himself. "Ok." he replied nodding slightly. He exhaled and waited a few moments before rising from his chair and using it as a step up to get on to the windowsill next to her.

She shifted slightly to accommodate him but didn't move too far down the sill. "_You_ Mr Potter need your head seeing too."

He laughed now, thankful she wasn't angry with him. "Probably." There was another silence before he asked, "So…what are you up to tonight?"

She shrugged and looked at the book that had been on her lap. "I was going to attempt to start some of the Ancient Runes translations I was given yesterday…but yeah, I just looked at that and changed my mind…"

James viewed the book with dislike; he had never been one for Ancient Runes, it bored the living daylights out of him. His father had tried to teach him at least some basic Runes knowledge throughout his childhood but James' brain just seemed to refuse to cooperate. "Never did quite 'get' Ancient Runes." he mused out loud and looked up to find Lily searching his expression with hungry eyes.

She flushed as she realised she'd been rumbled and looked to the floor quickly, trying to regain some composure and continue the conversation as normal as possible. "Some people are just more adept at certain subjects I guess…see me? I never could fathom Divination…it's all gobbledy-gook to me."

"Divination _is_ all gobbledy-gook Lily." replied James matter-of-factly.

She answered him with a glance and a small smile which he reciprocated…pretty soon they were smiling widely at each other and James nudged her arm. "Well I know how much you were looking forward to a night in the library translating Runes…you'll probably say no but how does an evening in the company of yours truly sound?.." he knew he'd sounded convincingly brave, like it really didn't matter whether she wanted to or not, but inside he was a knot of nervous tension. Seeing the flicker of shock registering on her face he covered his back slightly and continued "Well…me and my hoard of rabblerousing mates that is…I promise they washed this morning." He hoped his wide smile would banish the tiny crease between her eyebrows.

Smiling, Lily began to nod, though he would have given anything to know what she was thinking right then. "That sounds…lovely."

He was doing an internal happy dance but kept his outward appearance impassive, though pleased. "Excellent…it's been ages since we all hung out."

"Too long." she replied quietly, and he detected a hint of sadness to her tone.

He didn't have the chance to ask why she sounded so forlorn; something he saw made his top lip stiffen and his back straighten automatically. "Here comes your fan club." James muttered bitterly as he saw Jason and two other Ravenclaw's making their way over to the window. Jason looked a little agitated and one of the girls in the small band of students didn't look too pleased either.

Lily groaned slightly under her breath. "Hi guys…" she said in greeting to them, feigning enthusiasm.

They mumbled their greetings back but it was Jason who spoke, though not until he'd shot James a very putout look. "Lily we've been looking for you everywhere. There's a little get together in the Ravenclaw common room and _we_ wondered if you wanted to come?"

Lily took a second to reply, and when she did she sounded pleasant…a little too pleasant. "In the Ravenclaw common room? Surely I'd not qualify for an invite being a Gryffindor?"

Jason looked pointedly at one of the girls he'd walked in with and it was obvious she was dying to roll her eyes. "You're more than welcome Lily, you know you are."

"Oh thanks guys, that's really nice of you to think of me but I have plans…with James." she nudged James in the leg and he grinned on cue.

"Oh." said Jason eying James with even more disdain.

"Yeah, though I don't know Lily," said James with a twinkle in his eye. "…a get together in the Ravenclaw common room? Sounds fun!" He felt her pinch his hip and had to stop himself from laughing.

"Sorry guys," she said, ignoring James at her side. "Have a good time though."

James watched as the Ravenclaw's bustled out of the library, Jason at the helm, striding hurriedly. It gave him an immense amount of pleasure to see him turned down. An _immense_ amount of pleasure.

"Told you." he said nudging Lily's leg. "If that wasn't an invite to get you drunk and have his wicked way with you, I don't know what is."

"James!" she replied, pretending to be shocked, but laughing all the same.

---

Sirius had apparently gone MIA, though it didn't put a dampener on the evening's festivities. Its true that the small band of Gryffindor's didn't do anything special, but that didn't make it any less enjoyable. Lily did feel bad that Sirius had to miss out on it all but then again, after the incident he'd witnessed earlier on in the evening, she was a little glad he'd not returned to the Gryffindor boys dormitory (where the four of them had ended up) for fear of bringing up the argument she and James had been having when they'd bumped into him.

Dinner had been much sillier than usual. Remus had cracked a joke that made her pumpkin juice try and escape from her nose, which in turn made the boys laugh even louder. Peter had taken up the challenge to finish the entire pot of stew nearest to them after announcing that it was so delicious he could just about gobble it all. His stomach had been making the strangest of noises since and Lily was convinced he would barf on quite a few occasions; though he _had_ managed it all, and even managed to keep it all down much to the dismay of James, who now had to cough up five galleons. James had played his part well by keeping the light heartedness ticking along nicely, prompting the next lot of giggles, or the next opening for a joke. Lily couldn't help but think he had been making an extra effort since they had left the library earlier in the evening but she was pleased he had…it was nice to feel part of something again.

With Peter dying on his bed, Remus, James and Lily sat on the remaining three, shooting random hexes and curses at an empty butterbeer bottle trying to get it to stay in the air…they'd managed a whole five minutes in intense concentration before Peter had alarmed Lily when he'd jumped off his bed a scurried to the bathroom looking rather green.

"It's ok, it was a false alarm, I'm fine." announced Peter as he made his way slowly back to his bunk and collapsed on it with a _thunk_.

"You made Lily drop the bottle for a false alarm? Shame on you Wormtail." muttered Remus in mock disgust.

While a pillow flew at Remus' head and he retaliated with dirty washing Lily smiled at the scene. She'd always liked Remus, and thinking about it, she'd never really taken a dislike to Peter either. It had been James and Sirius she had had an aversion to…it had been those two who she had disliked so very acutely growing up. Though she'd had her judge in character unabashedly voided completely after the whole Severus Snape debacle…she tried not to go with her first instinct anymore.

She yawned and looked up at the canopy above Sirius' bed and smiled slightly. In the deep red velvet that hung above there were tiny almost invisible flecks of light. She studied them through squinted eyes for a few moments, deciding that if the dormitory lights were turned out that they'd shine that little bit brighter, and show well known constellations. It took one more second for her to realise Sirius Black, who was a Gryffindor through and through, who had run away from home and detested his purist families views, still held onto a small part of his birthright…the stars from which he and his father, and possibly generations of his pureblood family, where named.

Her heart ached.

What did she have to remember her family by? Not even a few faint bruises anymore as they'd long since vanished…

"Knut for your thoughts?" asked a warm voice from one of the corner bedposts.

Realising that the fabric fight had now finished Lily looked up into James' inquisitive hazel eyes then round at Peter who lay on the floor peering over his mattress having obviously just lost, then to Remus who too was watching her with a puzzled look on his worn looking face, then back to James.

"I'm a little sleepy I think…time for bed." she muttered as she almost tumbled on the quilt as she got up.

James raised an eyebrow under his untidy curtain of black hair.

"My own bed James." she added flatly though didn't stop the smile creeping into the corner of her mouth.

"But its only 11 o'clock!" grunted Peter as he struggled into a standing position.

Lily shrugged and looked apologetically in his direction. "I obviously need more beauty sleep than you guys." When she turned back to face James his eyebrow was still raised which annoyed her slightly. "What?"

Slowly he shook his head and smiled. "I'll walk you down."

She could have gotten down the stairs on her own, she was sure of it, but she kind of didn't want to leave him quite so soon so didn't put up any resistance. After bidding goodnight to Remus and Peter she lead the way out of the dormitory and down the dark spiral stone steps that lead to the warm cosiness of the Gryffindor common room.

The faint smell of dungbombs lingered in the air as they entered and found the place almost deserted except for a few brave youngsters who obviously weren't put off by the putrid smell. Lily wrinkled her nose and tried not to think of all that stew she'd eaten at dinner.

"Smells like someone wanted the common room deserted." remarked James conversationally as he sat on the arm of the chair closest to the entrance of the girls dorms.

Nodding Lily lent against the wall and looked around the dim lit room with squinting eyes. She could see no one getting up to anything untoward…so she shrugged and looked to the fire burning merrily away in the huge ornate stone fireplace.

"It's a shame Sirius wasn't here tonight…" she mused as she was aware James was watching her. "I'm guessing Peter would be up _ten_ galleons if he had have been. Where do you suppose…"

"Padfoot gets up to all sorts of mischief all on his own, he doesn't actually need us three hangers on." replied James quickly but with a grin. "He likes the outdoors does Pads…and yeah, I might have been a bit harsh on him earlier so…" he shrugged, not wanting to bring up the reasons for his short temper with his best friend.

Lily understood the embarrassed tinge to James' expression and shook her head as if to brush it aside, "He'll be over that by now James, you know he will. He knew you were…upset about something. It'll be fine."

He liked that she felt the need to console him, but really there was no need; James knew Sirius would be over it. In fact Sirius had probably been over it the second after it had happened…

"Though your friends are absolute lunatics, you know that right?"

James laughed. "Fit in pretty well then don't you?!"

Rolling her eyes she folded her arms and shot him an unimpressed look. "I'm going to bed."

"You really don't need any beauty sleep at all you know Lil." He'd said it before he'd really thought about it but sat and waited for the kind rebuttal that was sure to come.

For a second she hadn't got a clue where to look, let alone what to say. What does a girl say to a thing like that? She wanted to make a joke but thought the apprehensive expression he now showed wouldn't appreciate being poked fun at.

"Peter maybe…" he continued, trying to keep his tone light "…_you_ not so much…or at all, to be honest."

Still she could think of nothing to say back. Truth be told her mind had suddenly switched itself off.

He coughed a little and sort of half got up, half adjusted his sitting position. "In all seriousness though Lily, I hope tonight hasn't been too…irritating for you, err, what I mean to say is that I know we're just a bunch of blokes who act like kids some of the time but really, you know, we…"

She cut him off with her hand in mid air. "James tonight was just what I needed, thank you."

They were both satisfied with their respective smiles and looked once more to the crackling fire.

"And I still am really sorry for being…well, for the whole Jason Reeves thing…"

Not looking at James directly she cringed ever so slightly. "So you should be. But I suppose its ok."

"Only suppose?"

Lily saw him stand. She saw him stand and her heart skipped a beat; missed it entirely.

"Lily you've gotta better than only '_suppose_'…because I still feel really bad about being such a prat and need to know that you know that I'm sorry, but couldn't help it." He was standing right in front of her now and her heart that had skipped that beat just seconds before was making up for it now. He was so much taller than she was, and it sort of sent a scared tingle down her stomach.

She attempted to make light of the dizzying predicament she now found herself in. "I know you cant help being a prat James, I forgive you that."

He stepped closer to her, face imploring "Lily…"

She had to stop her swimming head, her thudding heart and her weakening legs. Quickly she reached a hand to his chest and placed it gently there to stop him from getting any closer. "James please, don't worry." His eyes were darting to and from each of hers and she smiled a small smile, trying not to invite any further closeness but not wanting to make him feel like he was being rejected. "There's nothing you need to be worried about." she murmured quietly and hoped he understood her meaning.

For another second or two they stood there in the light cast by the ebbing fire and dimmed candles.

Eventually Lily couldn't put it off any longer and had to leave; her knees were about to fail and she didn't much like the idea of having a heart attack in the common room. Slowly she rubbed the hand still on his chest in a firm circle and smiled once more. "Good night James."

He stood still as a statue as she left him slowly. "G'night."

How she made it to the top of the stairs she couldn't say but when she got there she literally collapsed onto her bed with her eyes closed tight desperately trying to regain some composure in her heartbeat. She had heard the "Are you ok Lily?" from one of the other girls she shared the dorm with and had just replied with a noncommittal "Sure."

When she was sure she could stand it she opened her eyes and rolled onto her back, sprawled across her bed covered in the same deep red velvet canopy as that of the boys.

She silently wished she had stars.

---

Only three Gryffindor boys emerged into the great hall for breakfast on Saturday morning. Sirius hadn't returned all night, though that wasn't such a strange thing. Remus had found the little dot '_Sirius Black_' on the marauders map running too and fro in what was charted of the forbidden forest so they knew he wanted to be left alone. Padfoot liked to run alone sometimes.

Sirius eventually showed up mid morning as the guys rested their full stomachs in the common room. "Come on you lazy lot! I've been out all night, make some room!" he announce loudly, shoving Remus over and plonking down next to him on the sofa.

"Why didn't you ask us to come with you?" asked Peter with a slight whinge "I'd have come."

"You might have…but James would have probably eaten us both with the mood he was in last night!" replied Sirius shooting a pointed look to where his best friend sat in an armchair, his quidditch magazine now on his lap.

"What do you mean?" asked Peter, his eyebrows raised under his mousy brown fringe. "James was in excellent spirits last night. Lily even joined us…"

"What?" asked Sirius with a scowl directed towards James. "You bit my head off last night! You two were arguing!?"

James sighed but shrugged a little embarrassedly. "Caught me at a bad time mate…sorry. We err…settled our differences."

"Oh right! Well I am glad you two are hunky dory! Don't worry about me though yeah? I'll be fine!" he retorted huffily.

"Someone needs a kip." remarked Remus lightly, which earned him a sharp punch to the arm.

"Shut up Moony you git. You didn't see him!"

"Sorry mate." apologised James again, looking uncomfortable.

Sirius raised his aristocratic looking nose up into the air, "You should be!"

Grinning, James flung a cushion at him and laughed at his disgruntled expression. "What did you do all night anyway? We saw your dot in the forest."

For a second it looked like Sirius wouldn't reply but eventually he did. "Well…to be honest my evening was uneventful except for running into a band of Slytherin's up to no good!"

The mood changed and James sat up straight, intently listening to his best friend, all light heartedness disappeared from his features. "Where? When? What where they up to? Everything Pads, I need to know everything."

So Sirius went into detail about what he'd seen and heard the previous night from underneath the bridge, including the bit about him being in his boxer shorts.

James ate it all in hungrily, his brows pulled right down behind the rims of his glasses. He'd been waiting for something like this to begin happening…for the Slytherin death eater wannabe's to start plotting and scheming and trying to prove they were worthy to serve He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named when they eventually finished their schooling.

"You didn't hear anything about exactly _what_ they were doing though?" asked Remus gravely.

Sirius shook his head and looked exhausted. "Nope. Only that my dear little brother is involved…and might rat them out…though to be honest I don't think he will…"

Someone else joined the conversation. "Rat who out? Sirius you look knackered, where were you last night?"

"Lily!" exclaimed Peter with a grin. "I ate seven sausages at breakfast this morning, I did!" he looked pleased with himself.

She laughed a small tinkling laugh. "You have a stomach of lead, I'm sure of it! Or at least someone cast an extension charm on it!" she looked around the four boys and her smile faltered. "What's wrong? What happened?"

There were some apprehensive glances being passed between them.

"What? What is it?" she looked worried. "Has someone been hurt?"

"No, no Lily, no ones been hurt, its ok, don't worry." placated James quickly.

"Yet." added Sirius knowingly. He had to explain himself then, as Lily didn't look consoled. He regurgitated his story once again for her benefit, as James closed his eyes and leant back in his chair, thinking about what it could all mean, and wondering how they were going to find out more.

After Sirius had finished Lily sat in silence for a moment, turning it over in her mind, then eventually opened her mouth. "Well you know what we have to do, don't you?" at their quizzical expressions she carried on, "We have to tell Professor Dumbledore."

"What?" asked James and Sirius together.

"Well…he needs to know! This isn't first year anymore…those Slytherin's could be planning something very dangerous."

"We're not telling Dumbledore." said James flatly.

"Excuse me?" she asked, blinking a few times.

"I said we're not telling on them like snitches. _We_ don't do that." he replied steadily.

For a second it looked like she was gathering her ammo. "I don't think you realise quite how serious this is James!"

"Lily, its Slytherin's! Nothing they ever do comes out as bad as they want it to!" he rolled his eyes and it irked her.

"So what? You just leave them alone to get on with it?"

"No!" added Sirius in defence of his best friend. "We'll find out what they're up to and put a stop to it. No need to involve teachers."

"That is ridiculous!" she exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air. "You are not eleven, and neither are they! This could be serious! In fact, they met outside of their common room right? Away from everyone else? Away from all the other Slytherin's and out of ear shot of anyone? Doesn't that prove how serious this is!? They want to be death eaters for Merlin's sake! Did you ever think that they might possibly be trying to prove themselves worthy?"

James felt annoyed that Lily expressed what he'd thought not minutes previously…but the way she was arguing with him…making him seem like he didn't give a damn about what they were up to, was getting him angrier. "Don't be so dramatic Lily, they're no match for our…"

"Don't you get it!?" she was red in the cheeks now and quite obviously distressed. "James you're head boy now! You have to put aside your petty rules and do what's best for everyone! What if what they're planning is aimed towards students? Aimed towards muggleborns? How many muggleborns need to get hurt for you to swallow your stupid pride?"

"Now hold on a second!" retorted James fiercely. "I have never, ever handed someone over to a teacher ok, I'm not that person so I won't do it! It's easily sorted, we'll just watch them like hawks."

"And what do you say Sirius?" Lily asked hotly.

Sirius had been watching them argue hotly and couldn't help but take James' side. "Lily, you don't know what they're like…they're thick heads, with big ideas and no guts. They never do anything worth a worry."

"I know what Severus Snape is like!" she answered, keeping her eyes off James. "I know how quick and twisted his mind can be! If he's in on something then it will work."

James sighed and continued like he was talking to a child. "Lily, Severus Snape is a slime ball. He can't even…"

"Stop being prejudice for two minutes and think! They're serious. It sounds like they're _deadly_ serious. I am not going to sit back and let them carry on planning whatever it is! As head girl I am taking some responsibility and telling Professor Dumbledore."

There was silence for a few moments as they stared crossly at each other.

"That's not how we do stuff Lily." said James flatly.

"That might not be how _you_ do things James, but it's how it's going to happen. I will not stand by and let them get on with it. If anyone has a chance at putting a stop to any wrong doing it will be Dumbledore." she managed to keep her voice steady but it sounded deadly.

"Maybe telling Dumbledore wouldn't be such a bad thing?" muttered Remus quietly, though he was rounded on my James a Sirius's angry expressions and backed down.

"Now will you be coming with me?" asked Lily as she made to leave. "Or am I going on my own?"

"You're going on your own because I sure as hell am not coming with you!" replied James angrily.

"Fine!" she turned and her hair splayed out behind her dramatically. "If anything happens to any of the students because of something those stupid death eater wannabe's have done, then its as much your fault as it is there's!"

"How the hell do you work that one out!?" asked Sirius hotly.

"Because you can't see past your own silly make believe teenage world of marauders and Slytherin's. This is not a childhood matter anymore. They mean business. And so do I. How do you fight the dark arts in times like these? With Dumbledore, that's how. Why don't you boys get back to your stupid games? Be sure not to graze your knees."

And with that she stormed from the common room and in the direction of Dumbledore's office.

"Brilliant! Just bloody brilliant!" exclaimed James, throwing his hands in the air.

---

**Sorry! I know I never quite cut these guys some slack but yeah... I do love them :)**

**So yeah! if you could leave me a review please? Would make my day :) xx**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey guys! Sorry about the gap between upates this time...as always :S **

**And as always I'm blown away by those who take the time to leave me a review! Like seriously, you guys are awesome and i 3 you all!!! **

---

"She's being completely unreasonable!"

"I know mate, I agree with you."

"I mean how can she blow up like that and not listen to reason?"

"Its ridiculous, I know."

"All up on her high horse, talking about snitching!"

"Yes James, we get the point!"

Sirius had been agreeing with his best friend for the past twenty minutes. They were now up in the dormitory and James had been pacing up and down since he stormed up there after Lily had disappeared.

"Well if she thinks I'm going to go grovelling to her again, and apologising then she's got a long wait ahead of her because I'm not saying sorry for anything!"

"Too right mate." replied Sirius in a bored tone, flicking through a motorcycle magazine. He understood why James was so irked by it, they never got teachers involved with inter-house disputes…but he thought James might have been going slightly overboard with the outrage. Every little thing just seemed to be amplified in regards to his best friend and Lily.

"She's leaving Dumbledore's office." muttered Remus quietly as he looked up from the marauders map.

James threw himself down on his bed and folded his arms in a huff. "Really, she is just being stubborn. There's no need to get Dumbledore involved. I hope he laughed her out of his office."

Peter leant toward Remus' bed from his perch on the floor and whispered, "At least he's stopped pacing...he was making me dizzy."

---

She stepped off the bottom of the spiral staircase that led to Dumbledore's office and let out a long breath. She had the feeling he _was_ going to look into what the Slytherin seventh years were up to, but she also had the feeling he would be chuckling to himself now too. She hadn't meant to have a rant about James, she really hadn't. But when he had asked why James hadn't come with her to the office to relay the details she couldn't simply stand there lying about him being too busy, or it only needing one of them. Nope, she had to go into a long-winded speech about the whole argument they'd had, how Sirius was on his side and how she thought them silly, puerile and childish.

If anyone ever had been in a head-meet-wall situation then that would be it.

She felt justified in telling the headmaster though, because really what choice did they have? If James and Sirius wanted to look into it themselves then she wasn't going to stop them, in fact it was probably a good idea that they did, but they also needed someone of authority to step in too, someone who might actually make the Slytherin's stop and think about what they were doing…if not then to at least put the wind up them. She would have told James all this if he hadn't have acted so infuriating and final, like she was going to listen to what he said simply because he'd said it.

---

It was very late in the Gryffindor common room and Lily had just sent two protesting first years up to bed; they were being far to rowdy and it was past midnight. After they'd disappeared she sat back down in her chair at one of the tables by the slightly ajar window and sighed. Her Transfiguration essay and all her reference books and notes were strewn over the table top in disarray and she pouted at it all; why couldn't essays write themselves? Why'd she have to waste hours and hours of her time bent over a table deciphering bits of text from mangy old books and cross referencing passages from her notes…

Her mind felt like it had been hit with a jelly-brain jinx.

She began to gather her things with the intention of heading up to bed but heard the portrait door open and someone climbing through. She kept still and silent backing into the shadows wondering who could be up and out at this time of night...

"Coast is clear."

Sirius Black strode in behind Peter who had been the first to enter the circular room. "Bloody sneaky gits, the lot of them! I'd give Padfoot's hind leg to know what they'd stolen from Slughorn's stash!"

"I know, me too…" added Remus with a grin.

"In fact I'd let 'em have Padfoot to know what they're doing!" added Peter, also grinning.

Sirius rolled his eyes but turned to James who was the last to enter, stowing something away in a bag slung over his shoulder. "What do your think Prongs?"

He ran a hand through his hair and looked tired. Lily hadn't talked to the guys since she stormed off to tell Dumbledore about the Slytherin's secret bridge meeting and could have guessed what they'd been up to.

"I think we might as well have been in bed."

"Yeah me too." agreed Sirius as he plonked himself on an armchair and yawned loudly.

"Me too."

They all whipped their heads round, and James even drew his wand.

"Woah James! I know we're not speaking but Merlin's beard I don't think I deserve that!" she had a hand to her chest; she wasn't expecting to have a wand pointing straight at her.

He quickly lowered his arm embarrassedly but his voice still sounded quite hostile. "You were lurking in the shadows, what do you expect me to do?"

"I was not _lurking_ in the shadows! I was tidying away my stuff." she replied indignantly.

"Still Lily…give a guy a heart attack!" said Remus, attempting to lighten the mood.

She continued gathering her stuff together muttering, "If you weren't out till all hours, creeping back in after midnight, maybe you wouldn't be so jumpy."

There was a loud bang and Lily jumped out of her skin, letting out a squeak of shock. James had inadvertently shot something out of his wand and hit one of the vases on the windowsill to the right of where Lily stood. Instead of apologizing he growled, "Don't start Lily!"

She had a book in her hand and dropped it in the vague direction of the table, but she wasn't quite focusing on it. "Please don't raise your voice at me." she almost whispered.

"Well stop acting all high and mighty!" he replied angrily not lowering his voice and stepping forward though he put his wand in his pocket.

She automatically withdrew slightly as a gut reaction and shakily tried to gather her papers. "I'm going to be out of your hair in a moment, ok?"

Sirius was frowning and stepped towards her too. "Lily?"

She didn't reply though and concentrated on what she was doing.

"Lily, don't ignore me…are you ok?"

"I'm fine." she muttered, picking up her bag and stuffing her papers inside quickly. "I was heading to bed anyway."

"You don't have to go on our account."

She glanced over to where James was concentrating angrily on the fire in the grate and turned back to Sirius. "I don't want to start a fight." and with that she left them to it.

After a few moments James turned around and sighed. "Right well, I don't think there's much more we can do tonight, we'll just have to get back on it in the morning and…"

"You shouldn't have shouted at her like that your know." cut in Sirius seriously.

"What?!" asked James, then he rolled his eyes. "Padfoot spare me the lecture ok?! Now about the reconnaissance…"

"Did you see how much she jumped when the vase exploded?" said Peter in a small voice from behind his fingers.

"I'm guessing she never got used to loud noises from treading on eggshells around her dad." said Sirius flatly, his eyes not leaving James. "I doubt she'd ever get over angry outbursts."

A sudden realisation hit James and his stony expression drooped. "I didn't think..." He hadn't meant for the shot of whatever to shoot from his wand and hit the vase, it just had. Sometimes if his temper got a hold of him he'd unintentionally do magic like that…it was why he'd put his wand in his waste band. But Lily had looked…well; she'd looked scared. "Shit."

---

Blearily Lily opened her eyes to the sound of shuffling about the room beyond her velvet curtains. She'd not slept well, tossing and turning all night. The look on James' face when he'd blown the vase up (whether by accident or not) wouldn't leave her dreams; he'd looked so angry for a split second. It took a few seconds for her to get the red folds of fabric surrounding her in focus.

"What's the time?" she said out loud, though her voice croaked slightly; hoarse from her crying through the night.

From the room beyond someone answered with an "Almost seven." and Lily sighed, rolling onto her back. She could sleep a little longer before she had to get ready for her school day…she didn't feel like breakfast anyway…

Something caught her eye and she turned her head to the left.

Sitting on the squished up pillow next to her head was an equally squished up flower.

"Oh…"

She sat up quickly, closing her eyes for a second to stop the slight dizziness in her head, before picking up the poor dishevelled looking lily, its petals all squished, pollen smeared across the white pillow case and crooked stem.

A lily on her pillow…

She sighed. It might have been a sweet gesture if she hadn't have woken up next to a flower which shared her name before…though when Severus had done it he had thought to put a shield charm round his, just in case she'd rolled over in the night and squashed it. Trust Severus Snape to think of the practicalities of conjuring a flower on a girl's pillow…

…and trust James Potter to not. "Bloody James Potter." she whispered beneath her breath as she sadly put her feet on the cold polished wooden floor and stood, swaying for second and padded towards the bathroom, past Mary who had just yawned widely.

"Lily, you've got yellow on your cheek."

---

Putting a foot on the bottom step of the stairs to the boys dormitory that evening, Lily wondered if swallowing her pride was a good idea…and then after she'd swallowed said pride, whether they'd forgive her wrong doings too? Whether _he'd_ forgive her wrong doings…

She lifted her other foot to the second step and hoped that her stubbornness hadn't caused any permanent damage. She'd not spoken to any of them other than a quick smile and "Hello" at Remus in Runes…she had the feeling they'd all been avoiding her all day, though she preferred it that way if she was honest.

James was obviously sorry for being in such a foul mood the previous evening; the flower on her pillow showed as much…but the problem lay with her going to Dumbledore to report the Slytherin 7th years, and she knew she'd need to be the one to apologise for that little spat.

Sooner than she was expecting she was stood before the wooden door to the boy's dormitory. The shiny brass plaque had been polished to within an inch of its life, and charmed too. Instead of only saying '7TH YEAR' as it was supposed to, it now held the word 'MARAUDERS'. A small smile crept across her lips as she went to push the door.

Locked.

"Dammit." she muttered under her breath, mentally grumbling. Why'd they have to be out when she'd finally mustered the courage to apologise? She huffed and pulled out her wand. "_Alohomora_." Nothing happened, though she hadn't really expected such an infantile spell to have been placed on _their_ door. It was a good job Lily was adept at dealing with complicated wards.

She was inside the door in no time, clucking her tongue at the mess in front of her. She wondered whether they'd made a little extra effort with the housekeeping when she'd spent the evening with them. Robes were all over the floor…books…the odd pillow…she rolled her eyes; she knew she wasn't the tidiest person in the world, but this was a little excessive.

"Guys?"

No reply.

Sighing she walked over to the bed closest to her, which she knew belonged to Sirius and looked around for a spare piece of parchment in order to write a note…just a quick little _'Popped round, you weren't here…your rooms a pigsty, catch you later!'_ kind of a note…if she could only find something to write on…

There was a pile of scrap parchment lying haphazardly on the bedclothes though it all looked used. She wondered if she could rip off a piece from the bottom of one, she was sure Sirius wouldn't mind losing a bit off the bottom of one of his sheets of notes. Rifling through a few she saw what looked like a bit of Transfiguration…some random Potions jargon…an odd stack of parchment all attached together and written on…she picked up a piece of parchment half filled with Merlin only knew what! She ripped off the bottom and picked up a quill from the bedside table and was about to write when something caught her eye…

On one of the scraps of parchment there was something moving…it looked like an ant crawling along the surface. She pulled a face that said '_ick_' and went to flick it off only to find it was actually ink moving across the page; an ink dot to be precise, and the dot had a name written next to it too: 'Regulus Black'.

Lily put her little note down now and focused her full attention to this little dot…it was moving up and down a…was that a corridor? She picked up the parchment and found it consisted of lots of folds…

"What the hell?"

As she turned it over in her hands more corridors were revealing themselves; staircases, statues and a lot more dots too. According to this, the dot labelled '_Josephine Thomas_' and the dot with her boyfriend's name '_Karl Briggs_' were alone in a little closet off what appeared to be the 3rd floor corridor.

"Merlin on a broomstick!"

She followed corridors, passageways and staircases all the way up to Gryffindor tower and knew then that this parchment was telling the truth. There were quite a few labelled dots in the common room, with the same names as those people who were in the common room now…and up in the very top room, in the boys dormitory stood a small dot labelled in a neat type she knew to be James' handwriting as '_Lily Evans_' and there was a tiny little heart punctuating the name.

She slowly sat on the bed, mesmerized by this little dot with her name next to it. How did this map know where she was? She was never normally in the boy's dormitory. Alone. And the heart?

She flicked through the folds and came to what could only be described as the 'front' of this marvellous map.

_**Messer's Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs proudly present the Marauders Map.**_

She gasped. _They_ had done this? _They_ had created this map? With all these tiny labelled dots? With all these intricate corridors and passageways? She couldn't believe it! The _genius _of it!

Suddenly more writing appeared,

_**Mr Padfoot would like to know why you, Lily Evans, have been snooping around in my things?! **_

She nearly dropped it. Mr Padfoot? _Sirius_? Was he somewhere writing this? Was it automatic? Did it really know who was holding it? She looked around the room, wondering if the boys were watching her, laughing as they made the map talk to her. If that was the case then why weren't their dots in the room too?

_**Mr Moony would like to think that you haven't been snooping everywhere Lily… Leave my chocolate stash alone! I know how you girls can get!**_

She giggled. Well what could she do? That was precisely what Remus would say if he were there…

_**Mr Wormtail hopes you didn't go under my bed Lily…just don't. Nothing good will come of it…there's stuff under there that bites!**_

She shot a glance to the underneath of Peter's bed and laughed; it was absolute chaos! But she didn't pay it much attention as she was aware that a certain someone hadn't 'spoken' yet…it seemed forever for the words she was most interested to read to materialize…

_**Mr Prongs really hopes you find it in your heart NOT to hand this map over to the authorities…we're really quite attached to it…and what are you up to Friday night?!**_

Her laugh was loud then as 'Mr Padfoot's' handwriting scrawled underneath 'Mr Prongs'…

_**Stop pestering the poor girl Prongs! Cut her some slack!**_

She would have sat watching the parchment arguing with itself if she hadn't just realised that if it knew where she was…it could tell her where the guys were. Quickly she opened it and ignoring the scribbling that was going on on the front she scoured the castle for the dot that was labelled 'James Potter'.

She spotted Peter's dot in the kitchens, which didn't surprise her. There were what looked like hundreds of house elves dots in there too, each labelled with their individual names.

Remus was found in the library but he was deep in the library where people didn't tend to go, with Marlene McKinnon no less! Well, she hadn't seen that one coming!

It was a few more minutes of painstakingly searching the corridors before she'd found James' dot on the 5th floor…down a dark seldom used corridor. As soon as she saw it her heart might have stopped beating. If this map was right, and she was pretty confident it was, then she needed to get tot the 5th floor corridor, and to James, pronto.

Flinging the map to the bed she set off at a run through the door, down the stairs and through the common room with very little thought…

…The map slid from its precarious position on the edge of the bed to hit the floor with a papery 'thud' lying open at the scene that had made Lily act so impulsively. The dot labelled '_James Potter_' was backed up against a seemingly harmless ink wall…surrounded by four others… '_Milton Ezra_', '_Thaddeus Mulciber_', '_Anthony Avery_' and '_Severus Snape_'…

---

**EEP! **

**So what do you think of that?!?**

**There is a reason why this chapter is smaller than recent ones...its kind of the first half of the ending :( I have had my epilogue written since the beginning...but the last chapter(s) have been in mind from the start too...**

**Please if you could be so kind as to leave a review I'd be so happy ^,^ reviews make me smile. And lord knows I could do with it xXx**


	11. Chapter 11

**So guys...this is it... :( I'll write my authors notes at the bottom...**

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There were a few things that kept Lily company as she ran through the corridors of Hogwarts castle in light thrown onto the stone by the many candles and the dusk moonlight coming in through the windows; the pounding of her feet on the stone beneath her, echoing loudly in deserted corridors, and the pounding in her chest, both from the exertion of running, and from the dread of what she was about to throw herself into.

Adrenaline thronged through her veins with such ferocity that if she hadn't had such a pressing problem to get to, she would have had to sit down and breathe deeply with her head between her legs.

She was glad her destination only warranted running _down _staircases and not up…her legs were all but giving up by the time she'd reached the 5th floor. Pulling her wand from her pocket she made herself stop for a second to get her bearings. Her chest heaving up and down she desperately tried to remember which corridor it had been, where she'd seen those tiny harmless ink dots. Why hadn't she brought the map with her? She could have located them easier.

Kicking off her shoes she silently made her way down the main corridors in the direction she remembered they had been…at least she hoped, but it wasn't long before she heard hushed voices and a chill of ice cold went trickling down her stomach.

Gripping her wand till her knuckles seemed to _shine_ white she slid to the corner where a corridor rounded onto another and hoped beyond hope that they couldn't hear her heart that pounded so loudly in her chest.

"Answer me Potter! What are you doing here? Following us?"

Mulciber. She recognised the voice. He had berated her a good few times before so she knew without even looking. In all honesty she really didn't want to look…she wished she didn't have to…

But she _did_ have to.

James…

_Her_ James…

James was in trouble, and needed her…she couldn't let her own fear stop her. She _wouldn't_ let her fear stop her.

Casting a disillusionment charm on herself just as a precaution she peered round the corner into the gloom where the group of Slytherin's were surrounding a figure suspended against a wall.

When she flattened herself back against the wall she desperately bit back the bile that had instantly rose in her throat…she needed a plan…some sort of plan, any kind of plan… why hadn't she thought about it as she'd ran? Why did she not formulate some sort of strategy to get James out of there? Why had she just run, mindless, into a situation she might not be able to get herself out of…a situation James wouldn't be able to save her from…

She peered round the corner again and tried to stop herself from rushing straight into it…James had blood down the front of his shirt, his head was lolled down against his chest, like he was unconscious. She forced herself to look at the whole scene, to take everything in…to find a way to get them both out of there…

"He's not so big without his boyfriend with him, hey?" cackled Avery, wagging his wand menacingly at James' bloody face.

"Jealous, Avery?" croaked James in defiance, raising his head slightly, though he looked weak.

"You're not in a position to be running your smart mouth Potter!" warned Avery, every bit of smirk gone from his face. "Or do you want another bout of the _crusiatus_ curse?"

"Avery…if all you're going to do is chat him up move aside, I'll get him to talk." said Mulciber, menacingly as he all but shoved Avery out of the way and pointed his wand directly between James' eyes. "Now Potter, why were your following us?"

"I wasn't following you." replied James shakily, obviously not being able to focus his eyes.

"You lie Potter!"

"Mulciber…"

A sheet of ice slid down Lily's back. Severus sounded so calm…so eerie…so unlike how she remembered him to sound…

"…Maybe Potter needs another reminder of why it's not good to meddle with other peoples affairs…_sectumsempra_!"

James' body tensed and he called out in pain, as a fresh wave of blood seemed to seep through his already bloody shirt.

Lily could take no more and acted swiftly. Suddenly appearing from her hiding place she sent such a strong stunning spell in their direction it hit all four Slytherin's at once, knocking two of them over, not that she stopped to take much notice. Propelling herself forward, she grabbed James and blasted the door behind him open, pushing him into the small room behind it, falling in with him, desperately trying to lock the door behind them from the floor, throwing all the wards she could think of at it, knowing they would hold for a little while at least.

Everything happened so fast, she really didn't think of what she was doing while she was doing it, but knew she had the element of surprise on her side. The Slytherin's had all been caught off guard, too intent on what was happening to James to be bothered about who may or may not be listening.

And now she lay on the floor, pulse pounding in her ears, spells pounding on the other side of the door, James beneath her…

"James!"

He looked half unconscious, his white school shirt now red, his face and hands smeared with his blood, ghostly pale beneath. He was tense and struggling to speak.

"Lily…"

She was still full of adrenalin as she tried to get a grip. She felt like she was going to lose it big time, tears leaking down her face automatically as with trembling hands, she attempted to undo the tattered sodden shirt and see the damage her ex-best friend had done to her…to _her_ James.

"Lily you…"

"Shhhh James, don't worry ok." she whispered back, her voice shaking as much as her hands. "They can't get in ok, you know I'm good at wards. I just, you're just going to have to forgive my really bad medical skills James, I could never do this sort of thing but your bleeding so much and I can't leave it or else you'll pass out, ok so just shhhh…"

He reached out his bloody hands and took hold of her wrists limply. She stopped and looked into his face, his glasses wonky with a smear across them but his hazel eyes were bright beneath them. "Lily…breathe…"

She smiled and let him guide her hands to his cheeks, which were hot as she closed her eyes and took a few shaky breaths before opening them again and staring down at him.

"You can do this Lily. You can. I know it."

And she believed him. Nodding she slipped her hands away from his face and picked up her wand that had dropped to the floor, finished opening his shirt and tried not to gasp at the huge gashes that criss-crossed his chest. There was no point dwelling on how much they must have hurt him, and how long he must have been at their mercy; she had a job to do now.

Remembering the incantations she'd never been able to get the hang of before she began to move her wand in deliberate motions over the wounds, muttering as her hands worked, shaking slightly still, ignoring James' attempts at hiding his gasps of pain and the thudding of spells and hexes still being thrown at the door.

Once she'd done all that she knew she could she drew herself level with James face once more. "James?" he was laying with his eyes closed, breathing steadily, almost forcefully.

"Mmm hmm?"

"James I'm sorry but that's all I can do. It's a dodgy patch job at best…"

He opened his eyes a smiled slightly. "It feels better."

"You're such a bad liar James Potter."

He grinned but closed his eyes again and changed the subject. "They've stopped throwing hexes at the door."

Lily shot a concerned look toward the wood that separated them from the corridor outside. "If I know Severus he'll be out there trying everything he knows to hit the counter for my wards… he'll get it eventually James, we can't stay here." her voice shook again.

His eyes were open again and he nodded. "Then lets get out of here."

"No James you can't…"

But he tried to move and gasped in pain as he reopened one of the deepest gashes across his stomach. "Buggering hell!"

She knew he wouldn't stop till he was stood, so she helped him up as best she could, trying to make it easier on his wounds, taking most of his body weight and trying to keep them both upright with her shaky weak legs. Finally he was propped against a table and Lily tried to close the gash up again…conjuring dressings this time, to bind him enough to hide the blood, though it seeped through the white cotton bandages anyway.

"You can't stay in there forever you know!!!"

Lily jumped. Mulciber's dulcet tones were sounding from through the keyhole.

"You've got to come out sooner or later! Potter won't last all night in there!"

He was right. James wouldn't last all night. In fact, he probably wouldn't last another hour with the amount of blood he'd lost. Her attempts at patching him up had only stemmed the bleeding…he'd need Madam Pomfrey to see to him if he was going to heel. She knew they had to get out of there.

"Where's your wand? Do they have it?"

James smiled and reached behind him, pulling his wand out of his back pocket. "I didn't have time to draw it, they hit me with a body bind before I even saw them, sneaky bastards."

She cast her eyes upwards, thanking Merlin for small mercies before moving closer to him. "How do you think you can walk, realistically?"

He had been leant against the desk for support and when he tried to stand on his own he lost balance. "Erm…"

"Dammit." She eased him back to the table and desperately looked about her for ideas, inspiration…anything! She felt desperation rise in her again and fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. "There are _four_ of them…I can't take them on my own!"

"There are two of us Lily!"

"No there isn't, James! There's one and a half at best! You're in no fit state to duel!"

He knew she was right but he couldn't stand the look of desperation in her face. "I can still curse Lily…I just can't…"

"Walk? Move? Dodge out of the way? James if we go out there and try and fight then we're both going to end up worse than you now…" She plonked herself on the table next to him and ran a shaky hand through her hair, not paying attention to the blood she was sure must be streaked through it now. "We're going to have to just try and run James. We're just going to have to try and take them out in some way…stun them, anything, and get onto the main staircase. At least then there may be someone..."

He was quiet for a minute while someone must have gotten frustrated outside and there were a few more bangs against the door.

"Ok." he replied eventually. "I don't like it, but your right. We need to get out and make a run for it." He winced as he straightened up and stood, using Lily to lean on and looked determinedly at the door.

"I've got a plan, ok?" she whispered, trying to keep the strain of holding him up out of her voice. "Just, when I say, you need to send the biggest stunning jinx you can, ok? Like, stun with everything you've got."

He looked down at her and nodded, his jaw set in determination and pain.

"Right."

Her adrenalin started up again, pounding in her ears and through her heart; she felt like the Hogwarts express was racing through her at a million miles an hour. If this didn't work, if they didn't get away, then she would probably end up worse than James. She was a muggleborn…maybe they'd not think twice about what they did?

Shaking these thoughts of failure out of her mind she gripped her wand in her right hand, her left arm round James' back. They were going to get out of this. They had to.

---

Why did _she_ have to show up? _Why?_ And now she was locked in that room with James Potter and he didn't know what the others would try to do to her when they finally got in there…how could he hurt her? Well…there was no question, he _couldn't_ hurt her. Not Lily. He wouldn't.

Severus Snape looked at the brown wooden door, covered in blast marks from the hexes that had just been thrown at it in an attempt to get in there. She'd put wards up, and boy were they strong. She had always been good with wards, she'd needed to be; and he didn't think he could break them.

"For Merlin's sake Snape, do you want to get in there or not?" spat Ezra, who was watching Severus staring blankly at the door.

"I'm thinking." replied Severus coolly; he never did think Ezra should have been involved with this, he was too much like Mulciber…all brawn and not much brains…there really was only call for one meathead in all honestly.

"Seems to me like your stalling." shot back Ezra.

Severus ignored him and lifted his wand once again, running it along the middle of the door, muttering everything he could think of to get it to open…everything he thought she would know…

For a second he thought he'd done it. For a second they all thought he had. The door had begun to rattle slightly and a rumbling noise could be heard from within the room. He stepped back only slightly and felt the thrill of triumph and dread all in one…how would he get her out of here?

But he didn't get chance to think of much else as the door swung open with such force it knocked him out of the way and into the wall behind it, momentarily stunning him as a wall of rats burst from where the door had been. The other three Slytherin's yelled and clambered to get out of the way as the rats all scurried towards them like a sea of fur and claws and teeth. Ezra let out a shout which sounded more feminine than he might have preferred but there was no time to think as James and Lily came into view for a split second before the red beams of light from their stunning spells hurtled into the corridor, clearly aimed at all who were out there.

Ezra hit the deck with a thud, Mulciber on top of him. Avery had managed to dodge out of the way of the first wave but had dropped his wand in shock when the rats had been scrambling towards him. James shot a _stupefy_ right at him as Lily was struggling to keep them moving down the corridor towards the main stair well.

"Where's Severus?!" she yelled in panic, her wand arm grasped round the front of James as he had slumped with the effort he'd just put in to move quickly.

Severus jumped out from behind the door, his wand in his hand, pointing straight at them. "_Expelliarmus_!"

James' wand flew from his hand and the two Gryffindor's almost toppled over in their surprise.

"Don't try anything funny Potter! You're wandless!"

Lily held her wand out, a slight shake to it but her features were set. "Don't you even think about it."

Severus couldn't bring himself to point his wand at her, so he left it on James, even though he was without a wand, though he directed his question at her, a slight whine in his voice. "Why did it have to be _you_ who showed up?"

"What? How does the fact that it was _me_ change this?" she asked with feeling.

"Lily you don't understand!"

"I understand Severus. I understand better than you might think."

They stared at each other for a few seconds, Severus not knowing what to say, Lily just daring him to say anything, but they were both caught off guard when Avery, who must have managed to get to his wand, shot a disarming spell at Lily from the floor.

She gasped as her wand flew from her hand and spun round to see Avery getting to his feet. James was attempting to get Lily behind him though it was difficult as he was using her to keep him upright, his face as pale as a ghost but his jaw was set.

"Take them out Snape!" urged Avery as he staggered over. "Time to show that filthy mudblood she doesn't belong here with…" but he didn't get to finish his sentence as Severus had spun his wand round in an awkward jerk and shot a stunning spell right smack bam into Avery's chest. He flew with some force into the wall of the corridor behind him and slid to the floor, clearly unconscious this time.

When Severus turned back round to face Lily he saw confusion in her features. "Sev?"

James made to move towards Avery's wand, which was lying on the floor a few meters away but Severus sprung at him with his wand outstretched, his expression ferocious.

"NO!" shouted Lily, throwing herself in front of James; arms spread wide trying to shield him, knowing he wouldn't be able to take much more. "Sev _please_!" she looked into his hate filled black eyes and pleaded. "_Please_ Sev, please don't do it."

Severus wavered…his wand swaying.

"Please Sev, don't…"

She was crying. _Crying!_ Her huge bloodshot green eyes were fearful and pleading. Her speckled cheeks were covered with tears and blood…

"_Sev_?"

He couldn't. How could he?

Lowering his wand he felt a prickle of something behind his eyes but turned away before it could show. She had thrown herself in front of _him_. _**Him**__._ It was obvious to Severus she'd made her choice…just like he had made his…but he hated it with everything he had in him. _Everything_.

He didn't care what the other Slytherin's would say when they finally came too…he was never going to hurt her… Furiously, Severus smashed a fist into a glass window as he stormed away; away from the mess… he just needed to get away from them…from Lily…_his_ Lily…and _him_…

Lily was too intent on watching Severus' retreating back through her bleary eyes that she didn't realise James had passed out until she felt him slip to the floor with a _thunk_.

---

---

Apparently what Madam Pomfrey had given him should have knocked a hippogriff half unconscious, and even though James had lolled off to sleep at some point he was now very much awake, and in pain. Whatever spell Severus Snape had used had been a powerful one; and dark, as all the spells and potions he'd been given weren't really helping.

Trying to take his mind off the pain he thought about the room in which he and Lily had been trapped; the sheer panic in her eyes, the blood on her hands, her pained determined attempts to close his wounds just enough to be able to get him out of there…

She was more heroic than she gave herself credit for.

The night she had turned up on his doorstep in summer, covered in blood and clearly traumatized, he'd seen her as a helpless damsel…someone who needed saving and keeping from harm… tonight he supposed he had been the damsel in distress…and _she_ had stepped up to the plate and shone. Taking on _four_ Slytherin's! One of them _Severus Snape_…her ex best friend…who was obviously in love with her…James could see it in his face when he thought Avery was going to curse her; that thought made his stomach turn.

What was going to happen next, he wondered? According to Dumbledore Snape had an alibi for the evening in none other than Regulus Black, and although his comrades had been stunned, rounded up and interrogated, they all swore Snape wasn't there. It looked like he'd be getting off scott-free.

His anger began to rise; he couldn't believe Snivellus would get away with it, though he was sure Sirius would come good and make the grease ball suffer for the callous and cowardly attack. Four on one was hardly fair.

Suddenly there was a creek from the end of the hospital wing and James winced slightly. He had automatically gestured towards his wand on the bedside table but being heavily bandaged and still in a lot of pain he hadn't got very far. Glancing at the clock on the wall it was 2:15 am…surely nothing good could come of someone sneaking around at that hour!

Squinting his eyes into the darkness he saw that the door had been opened slightly and his heart pounded in his chest. He was basically defenceless; he hadn't a chance in hell of being able to fend off an attacker.

For a few long tense seconds nothing happened, and all James could hear was his pulse in his ears against the dense darkness around him. Then a flicker of something silvery and eventually Sirius appeared from under the invisibility cloak, followed closely by Lily.

"It's ok," whispered Sirius, though to the girl beside him, not to James, "I've got the map, keep the cloak in case Pomfrey shows up."

"Thank you Padfoot." she whispered in reply.

James would have spoken aloud if Sirius had have given him half a chance. He silently saluted from the door with a huge grin on his face and disappeared, his footsteps getting softer the further down the corridor he went.

The door shut softly and Lily was swift over the floorboards, her feet making next to no noise. She was carrying the invisibility cloak but draped it over the chair next to the hospital bed, her eyes never leaving James.

He didn't need to ask her a thing as she lifted the covers up at the edge and began to climb underneath. James scooted over as much as he could and was instantly aware of how she had been able to move so silently; her bare feet were freezing!

She silently tucked herself into the nook under James' arm and gathered the bedclothes around her, only looking up into his face when she had gotten herself completely comfortable.

He wasn't sure if the quickened thumping was his heartbeat or hers, but really it didn't matter as she tilted her head up enough to put her lips onto his purposefully. They fit perfectly. They fit perfectly and in that first kiss he knew that the last few months of tiptoeing, making mistakes and heartache had been worth it. The years of knock backs and insults were worth these glorious seconds or minutes…or could they have been hours?

They both knew it.

Even the pain that had been so intense was nothing compared to the intensity of her. They couldn't move much, with him so heavily bandaged, in that hospital bed made for one, but every tiny movement was like the grandest gesture in their tiny bubble. Every second was like a glorious hour, yet there was not enough time, there would never be enough time for them to ebb…he would never get tired of it, of her lips, her soft thick deep red hair, her brightest of emerald-green eyes and her pale freckled skin. He would have wanted to stay in that moment forever if he didn't know there would be many moments after this that would make him wonder whether there could ever possibly be anything more a man could want from the world.

---

They could have stayed in silence all night…

They could have whispered sweet words to one another in the darkness…

Lily could have even chastised James about the cloak and map…

There could have been a lot of ways that evening played out but all Madam Pomfrey knew the following morning was that huddled into the nook of James Potter's arm, in the hospital bed she'd left him in, was a rather pale but peaceful looking redhead…they'd both been through an ordeal…they were both sleeping contentedly…and she couldn't quite bring herself to wake them.

---

**A/N-**

**There we go, finished! (apart from the epilogue)**

**...what do you think? I'm really sad about it ending to be honest...but it was always going to finish here :( ****I am going to post the epilogue almost straight away...it has been written since the beginning...its only short and is slightly bitter sweet...**

**Thankyou to all you readers who have left reviews :) you've kept me going with this, even when it seemed like I wouldn't get to the end! I'd like to apologise to you all for the length of time between some updates :S but you know how it can be when life goes down the shitter ;) got there in the end though! **

**Love to everyone who stuck with Lily through the tough times to the good :) and with James as he bumbled his way towards his girl :) but my favorite guy will always be Sirius X) **

**Thankyooooooooou **

**xxx becks xxx**


	12. Epilogue

**EPILOGUE...**

**---**

"Dad?"

The _whoosh-click … whoosh-click … whoosh-click_ of the oxygen mask sounded so severe in the silence.

"Lily flower?"

Tears had sprung to her eyes as soon as she'd seen him and they fell freely now. When he'd finished moving the mask away from his face she reached for his hand.

"Dad…" choked out Lily quietly, as her cold fingertips wrapped around his warm palm, avoiding the grey clip on his finger that was checking on his pulse rate.

The doctor had been a friendly looking young man…very young…_too young_? Lily had sat in the small room she'd been ushered into wondering how long the doctor in front of her could possibly have been qualified…a distraction from the topic of his hushed voice, and the reason she'd been urgently called to this beige looking muggle hospital that smelt mainly of disinfectant and faintly of the urine it was trying to mask.

The words _'liver failure' _were vaguely familiar ones to Lily…she knew sort-of what it meant but she didn't really know much more about it. Muggle type ailments were so scarce in her world that she hadn't really needed to worry herself with them.

"…due to prolonged liver damage caused by excessive drinking," the polite young man in the creased looking shirt had said. Lily had noticed the stain of something possibly pudding related on the crooked tie hanging askew from the doctors collar…_distractions, distractions_…

She'd been sat in the room for just about seven minutes (the big white faced plastic clock on the wall had said so) before she was aware she was being urged out of it. She'd registered that someone had hugged her…that comfortable smell, the safe reassuring arms, the murmurs through her hair…

But none of it had truly sunken in…it hadn't hit her until he'd said her name.

Now she fully understood the situation. Seeing him she knew why the doctors had been so sincere with their words, so hushed in their manners; she knew why it had been such an urgent message.

James' hand had been silently on her shoulder and in that clinical almost foreign place she felt like she loved him that little bit more.

The oxygen mask was blowing air at nobody as her father attempted to speak, though it was obviously very difficult for him. The pneumonia he had caught whilst being so ill was hampering his breathing…

"Lily, I'm sorry…"

She shook her head holding back the sob. "Don't dad, please."

It was obviously so painful for him to speak so they sat in silence for a while, Lily perched on the side of the hospital bed, still holding his warm clammy hand. Eventually her father spoke again. "How's your life, love?"

Her life?

_Her life..?_

Sometimes running…sometimes hiding…sometimes fighting… her life in a world racked with war and those that would murder her in a breath if they could?

She couldn't tell him all that. Not then…not then with him looking so torn open from a war he'd been fighting of his own, against his own demons. So she told him what she felt she could. The part she knew he'd prefer to hear. The truth about the one part of her life she'd never change, not for the safest life in the world…not for anything…

"I'm going to be getting married soon dad." and for the first time since she entered that hospital, she smiled.

"Married?" he choked, his eyes darting to where James was stood behind her, supporting her like he'd promised he would.

"This is James." she rubbed James' arm as he stepped forward to make himself more visible to the bleary eyed muggle with so many tubes leading in and out of his body.

"It's in a couple of weeks." added James courteously though Lily knew her husband-to-be could never forgive her father for the way he had treated her. "I'm sure Lily would love for you to be there, sir.

If it were possible she could have fallen in love with James all over again in that moment.

---

Her friends insisted they support her at the funeral…

...her _family_…her _new_ family.

Moony and Wormtail were both so loyal, so loving. Always finding a way to lighten the mood when all seemed too bleak, always eager and willing to eat Lily's cooking…

…Padfoot. Her dear wayward brother Padfoot. Who would want for another sibling with Padfoot in their life? He insisted he call her his little sister, though there was only a few months age difference between them. She felt safe with him, and worried about him constantly, though he was obviously capable of looking after himself.

And James Potter…her soon to be husband…her reason for strength and courage. The one person that had never given up on her; never walked out on her or raised a hand in her direction. The one man she knew she would never be able to function properly without.

She felt blessed. Blessed that she had these wonderful people in her life.

…And finally there was the last piece of her family puzzle…the piece she'd not told anyone about yet…she automatically put a hand to her stomach and her heart swelled in equal measure of joy and grief as they all walked slowly from the windswept graveyard by the litter ridden canal where her father had just been laid to rest.

---

**:'(**

**3**


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